Plateau

Last night, at around 7:00 PM, I spoke with Nightwing on the phone, and told him that I was going to flake out on going sarging with him. The night before, Friday night, we went up to West Palm. We went to all the usual places where we go. It was not a bad night. I think that we each opened 5 or 6 sets. Opening is no longer a problem. Even when the target flakes out or we decide to eject, there no longer is that feeling of rejection. It is just another trial and error experience; another opportunity to experience and learn. It is no longer about trying to get sex; it is no longer about conquest. It is all about social psychology, and learning more aboiut women, appreciating women, enjoying looking at their eyes without shyness or anxiety, enjoying the fact that their cognitive processes are so different that ours and yet they are so lovely. Yes, maybe Mystery only pursues HB10+s, but, I have begun to find beauty and pleasure in the conversations with the 8.5 who is a little plump, but has adorable freckles, and a high IQ. Maybe Mystery and his crew only go after models and actresses, and I admit that after I complete his workshop, for which Nightwolf and I have already registered and bought our plane tickets, I hope to be able to game such women. But, still, the pleasure of talking to a charming, conversationally adept, intelligent 8.0 with a pretty if over 40 year old face and body, is so delightful, that I am willing to forgo the twenty-something girls with their firmness to my wingman. Ross boasts that at his ripe old age of 40-something, he still gets 20 year olds. Who cares? Twenty year olds are easy. They are in that mode of exploring their sexuality. There is something delightful in more rare quarry. You know, the Anjelica Huston sort of a woman. Someone with grace. Of course, you there reading this might be thinking that this is a essay of sour grapes, explaining why I would delight in a woman at whom you would not make a second glance while finding excuses not to pursue the younger models. Well, this past week, I had llunch with a woman who might have been an HB9.0 20 years ago, and it was a truly delightful experience. Before I sarted to study the PU Arts, I do not think I would have had the inner game to ask her to go for lunch with me, to pursue her as a friend. I am writing this in April, and when I started on this adventure in January, I did not have the friends I have now, or the options in seeking the company of a variety of women that I have now. It took about four months of sarging three nights almost every week and being encouraged and encouraging my wing to get here. If PUA was ONLY about getting laid, then I would feel a terrible failure. In my opinion, PUA is about a way of thinking, behaving and living which is transformative and which promotes a sort of Epicruean set of values. The lone wolf is rare, we, like most canids, except perhaps the coyote when forced, are communal, pack animals. Not only have I developed skills which i had already possessed for Pick Up, but, I have developed a circle of friends who share this (and other) interests. The thing which troubles me as I approach the workshop with Mystery and his crew, is that I feel as if I have reached a plateau. I open, neg, DHV, tell a story or two, but in certain venues, I do quite well and other venues, I feel as if I am back in January where I had started. I had a discussion about this with Mr. Right. He and I agreed that we both do best in more quiet, lounge type venues, and that we don't do as well in the noisy club, which my main wing prefers. I see the loud noisy club and its accompanying club game as the archetype for all other game, so I persist. The women in clubs bore me. I think they know it. The women at those professional networking events which are only nominally about professional networking, and more about single's netwokring aer so much more interesting, and intelligent. So, last night, I just felt tired. I did not want to go out and do the same thing until 2 or 3 AM. I wanted to figure out how to rise above the plateau where I feel stuck before going out again. I have seen Deangelo's latest videos. Many mPUAs talk about inner game and natural game and about the relavance of technique with a disdain which sometimes sounds like personal disdain for Mystery. Confidence comes from the experience of success. Success comes from trying and learning and observing one's improvement. It's like jazz, you need some basic talent, and consistent practice, and only then after intergrating and internalizing the scales and rules and theory can you then improvise. Imrpovisation without an understanding of music theory is mere discordant noise. Theory without heart is cold and stiff. I feel like I have found a plateau. After opening, I rely on a natural game which is not consistently effective for all venues. If I were merely looking for a girlfriend, I could achieve that goal already with what I know. If I was looking to add to the many notches I already have on my belt, I could call any one of a number of women and try to advance the seduction process. My goal really is to understand women, to develop the skills to be able to walk in to any venue and walk out with friends and #-closes which could develop into something more. Last night, though, I felt tired. Seduction, though, like jazz or painting or sales is ultimately a skill which can be learned. That is why I admire Mystery. He understands that it is not enough to just be skilled in the PU arts but one must also be able to teach, one must be able to operationalize the skills in order to understand and improve upon one's skills. There are mPUAs and naturals who are unable to teach and do not understand how they do what they do well. As much as I enjoy the company of a woman, looking at her face and having her look into mine, I enjoy the intellectual, theoretical discussion I have with my wings. We all delight in the image of a revealed woman's breast. When I was in my late 20's, I spent a two year period going to Wiccan gatherings and Rainbow gatherings. At those events, many women, imagining some continuity with the 1960's or an imagined, romantic paleolithic, would walk around in various states of disrobe. One particular summer, before I moved to Florida, I spent a summer in continual attendance of such gatherings and saw many, many breasts. I saw small pert, perky breasts and sagging, earth mother breasts and all sorts of breasts in between. After that summer, my sense of female beauty changed. The emaciated thin sort of model type no longer seemed as beautiful as women of fuller figure. Recently, I had a similar experience. After many openings, beautiful women have begun to feel as ordinary as ordinary women. They are just another face, and they must qualify to me. Whatever they think of their own beauty is not what is important anymore. Their own sense of their value no longer determines my sense of their value nor my sense of my own value. Soon, June will be here and Nightwolf and I will be going to Mystery's workshop. Nightwolf and I have often talked about what we hope to learn and how we will benefit from that weekend.