In 2010, there's really no such thing as a blind date anymore.
A few weeks ago I was in a conversation with a secretary at work. For some reason, I felt that talking with this woman who was twice my age could get interesting. I asked if she was married, she asked if I was single, and then said she could hook me up with some girl she knows. Some med school student.
So it was kind of a blind date. I was given HBGiggles's email and was to set
the ball rolling. I sent her an email … nothing very interesting. Her response seemed normal enough, but for some reason I interpreted it as her thinking she was better than me. I then resolved to write back with more conviction, but still a little bit of humor. I tell her that we don't have to really do the blind date thing because this is 2010, so just add me on Facebook and let me know if you're still down to meet this week.
She adds me on Facebook. And no response for like 2 or 3 days. The secretary from work emails me asking what's up, saying that she “Can’t handle the suspense.” I tell her that I thought she wasn't interested because she didn't write back. The secretary says “No, she thought you weren't interested after seeing her Facebook !” Then she adds, “We saw your video on Facebook and we think you’re hot !” It was an interesting misunderstanding, because we never really know what another person is thinking.
It's weird to date someone who knows someone from your job. It's hilarious when your boss and your other coworkers say “Hey good luck tonight.” You think they're talking about work, but they're talking about getting pussy.
Eventually we decide to meet at a Mexican style bar.
Me: You could send me a text or call once you get there and don't see me. You'll recognize me though, I'll be the black guy (laughing).
I get there before she arrives and notice everyone's giving me weird looks. Even the bar man looks a bit weirded out by me. I get a beer and sit for like 10 minutes in my own isolated corner.
Finally she comes, apologizing for being late. I say nothing and just give her two sensual kisses on both cheeks. We sit down closer to the front of the bar. We're divided by the corner of a table. The conversation starts off stupidly.
Me: So tell me, why did you decide to go into medicine ?
I say “stupidly” because it makes no sense to make it an interview when you first meet someone. I wanted to tap into my inner
PUA and just get right into it with
kino and all that.
I put my arm out just to hold her hand. She complies and rubs it as I do, and then I take my hand away. I'm sitting way back, pretty relaxed. We talk about our upbringing. One of my favorites:
Me: I was brought up in a Jamaican household. My parents had three main types of discipline. Short range, mid-range, and long range. Short Range is a slap to the face if you're acting up. Mid-range is when they take out the belt. Long range is when they take off their shoe and hit you from down the hall way. (rubbing my neck) My mother's aim was actually pretty good.
She's laughing at my jokes. I'm testing how receptive she is to my touch. Brushing my hand against the small hairs of her arm. She's receptive.
Me: I wanna tell you a secret, (I look behind me) but I don't want you to tell anyone else.
I take this as an opportunity to close distance and put my chair closer to hers. Then I give her a kiss on the cheek.
HBGiggles: You know, I made a nickname for you. Me and the girls always have little nicknames for guys that we meet.
Me: What's mine ?
HBGiggles: YOYO-Boy.
Me: Excuse me ? That's YOYO-MAN to you ! I'm gonna call you Ms. Giggles, because you're always smiling all the time.
HBGiggles: It's weird, usually when I go on blind dates or try Internet dating there's always some initial awkwardness, but it's different with you.
Me: Well sometimes we just go on bad dates, but then there are times when you meet someone who's just right. You know, it only takes a few seconds before you know if someone is right for you or not. I mean, I would feel a little disrespected if you bounced after 30 seconds, but it would be understandable.
HBGiggles: Haven't you been on Internet dates before ? That's why I brought my own car, just in case !
Me: I wanna tell you another secret. (Another kiss on the other cheek.)
HBGiggles: How come you're so relaxed ?
Me: It's because living in this moment is the only thing that matters really matters ... (I talk about some things from the book the Power of Now. The future and the past aren't that important, we only really live in the present.)
HBGiggles: You're very interesting, Actual.
Me: Come here.
We make out.
HBGiggles: Usually it takes a few nights before I do anything like this.
Me: Well, hey, sometimes you just meet the right person.
While making out:
Me: I wanna pin you up against a wall, and make you feel so good.
HBGiggles: You sound like Barry White.
Me: It's cause you like it when I talk like this.
Learn the art of seduction with others, participate in discussions, make friends, get exclusive content. It's free ! Why wait for your life to get better ?
Join the Cliff's List Community now !We make out again and I could see the bar owner is not too happy. He's acting as if he's closing up shop, “accidentally” hitting the leg of my chair as he walks by.
Me: I don't think this guy likes us that much. Let's leave before he brings out the shotgun.
We leave and then I tell her, “I wanna sing you a song, let's go to my car.”
HBGiggles: Hey, you parked right next to Rhonda (the name she gave her car).
Me: Oh, it's parked right next to Red Desire (the name I gave mine).
HBGiggles: Did you just make that up or is that really what it's called ?
Me: Come let's go into Hotel Actual.
We make out. I try to touch the hot spot, but she denies it.
HBGiggles: No, not on the first date
Me: Sure, I can respect that.
We kiss more, I try to tease with going in to touch the breast under her bra. She says something about how she has to know me a bit more. She asks me why I'm so comfortable and not nervous.
Me: When I was younger I used to be afraid of everything. I was shy and all that stuff. And so I resolved to never be afraid of things in my life anymore.
She asks if I'm a reader. I tell her that I like that she's reader and that I like intelligent people. She says something to the effect that a lot of intelligent people are boring. I tell her I guess that's why she was interested in talking to a guy named YOYO-Boy.
We make out. I grab a bit of ass but that's the full extent. There wasn't enough comfort. I don't know if she felt that I was being authentic.
HBGiggles: Will you feel disrespected if I say I have to go now ?
Me: No, not at all. Hey, remember to make this confidential ! I don't wanna hear the secretary talking to me about my car being named Red Desire.
I was totally unattached to the outcome so my game was tight. I made sure to keep solid eye contact the whole time (
being a man), escalate the
kino, and keep it sexual throughout the whole interaction.
Hopefully when I see my boss on Tuesday she doesn't say something like, “Work on getting through the LMR on the Day 2,” or worse, “HBGiggles told me about you trying to get a SNL, you're fired.”
Haha, either way that was an interesting night.
