Most Of The Women Have Egos The Size Of Toledo Ohio

The following are all in response to Barron's article “Women Today Really Aren't Worth The Time.”

I never thought I'd reply with a comment, but a few things stick out here which I want to agree with. Barron is right. By the way, I am 51, not a PUA, and never have been.

1. Barron is right to say that a lot of women today give out defensive-aggressive signals. From my knowledge of Europe, this is maybe worst in London. I daresay New York is worse still. It is a cover for insecurity. Probably not too hard to get past it, but unless you want an insecure woman, why bother ?

2. Chat-up lines are also a cover for insecurity. This week, a glamorous London woman told me that women hear the lines, and listen to men tripping themselves up, but they don't mind because they take a chat-up line for what it is: a way of getting to know someone, like talking about the weather. At least the guys with chat-up lines are making the effort to meet a woman. If they cannot talk to another human being without a script or a technique (which most women see through and forgive men for), that is better than nothing.

3. Barron, who is 57, says women today aren't worth the time. I hope he won't be offended: that's age talking. Over 55, you are maybe less hungry. If you have a bit of experience, you also know the trouble playboys get into. This is point is really emphasized at the end of that book about Mystery's PUA methods, I think it's called The Game ... anyway, everyone here has probably read it. But if you really get to know guys over 60 who have been PUAs (and the ones who have had passionate affairs) you will learn a lot about how to succeed, and about the prices they have paid for success on various levels (emotional and financial). Just what the prices are depends on their methods: the extent to which they use dishonesty, money, status, “natural game,” and other factors. These factors also feed into the type of woman (or women) you find around you, especially as you get older. If you use signals about status or money, about being a nice guy or a bad boy, to get women, that's fine ... just don't be surprised if one or more women get you, and require you live up to those things.

Reading Barron's post struck a chord with me, and I felt compelled to reply with my perspective on what this whole “pickup” community is about. So here it is:

In this newsletter, Barron commented that many of these websites, books and DVDs are phony ... but this information isn't just here to show you step-by-step what to do to approach women (though there is definitely tons of good info out there if you want to learn how to do just that.)

What this whole PUA community has grown into from my perspective is a field of personal development filled with guys who are passionately committed to becoming the best people they can be.

Jim Rohn says, “Work harder on yourself than you do on your job.”

Well I say, “Work harder on yourself than you do on meeting women.”

And the women will come, but that's not the point of this for me ...

This field of knowledge is way more important than meeting women. It really is about becoming the best men we can be, which goes far beyond improving our lives, or even improving the experiences that we give to the women that we meet.

As a matter of fact, the impact of becoming the best people we can be is so far-reaching that I can't even begin to explain it.

Becoming physically, psychologically, socially, and emotionally healthier allows you to be a better son, father, business man, employee, leader, mentor, role model, boyfriend, husband, friend, and so on.

It allows people to learn from you, be inspired by you, be empowered by you, receive guidance from you.

A lot of guys at a deep level realize the truth that when you sort out this area of your life called “women and dating,” a lot of the other areas of your life start coming together as well.

It's no coincidence, either, that women are instinctively drawn to men who have their acts together ! So get your act together, but not just for the sake of women … for your own sakes, for your families' sakes, for the sake of the whole world !

This isn't about lines or techniques. It goes way deeper than that. This is about being the best men we can be, and there's nothing cheesy or phony about that. As a matter of fact, I can't think of a single thing more worthwhile to our collective time, energy and effort !

Ghandi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” I know that we all have the opportunity to do just that !

And with awesome mentors like David D., Adam Gilad, Sinn, and others around us (just some of my personal favorites), that process has become a hell of a lot easier !

As a guy in Barron's age range, I do think that women in the “old days” were different. Nicer. Today they are told by magazines and TV that they are great. They should go out there and not settle. They deserve only the best !

So what happens is that many women (especially younger women, but also older) buy into this, and develop an ego ... even the ones that are not all that hot.

I say this based on my experiences. I have dated several women in their twenties. I find it interesting that most men I know have low self-esteem, while most of the women have egos the size of Toledo Ohio.

Still, we love them all.