She Was With Her Wife

I was at a family member’s birthday party and was talking to one of his friends when I spotted a cute girl whom we will call HBC. Within a few seconds of seeing her, I opened her with a compliment. I told her, “Your outfit fits you perfectly.” She said thanks, and I told her how I try to give compliments as often as possible.

While we were talking, her friend, HBG, came up to me and told me, “It's cool that you do that.” I said thanks, and introduced myself to both of them. They were able to tell I was really comfortable around women.

HBC and I talked about general subjects, our hopes and dreams, but then she launched a shit test. She showed me a ring on her ring finger and told me, “I am married to my girlfriend.” Then she pointed to another woman in her group whom we will name HBA.

I simply told her congratulations, and then told her the differences between the ring fingers and their meanings in different cultures. The ring finger is on the left hand in North America, whereas in many parts of Europe, the ring finger is on the right hand. She kept on saying she was with her wife, HBA, and I said, “Awesome.” She somehow realized that I had disarmed her, and I had been accepted by 2 thirds of her group, HBC and HBG. HBA and I never talked throughout this whole interaction.

HBC asks me if I smoke. I tell her I will join her and we go out to the terrace. We hang out, and she is constantly looking at HBA. I ignore it completely. I point to my cheek and she kisses me on the cheek. I then tell her how I am trying to collect 100 kisses. She then grabs me and starts making out with me. I am thinking hooray.

While she and and I are interacting, she is constantly looking at HBA, and then mentions, “My friends do not like you and they think you are a little round, but I prefer smart guys over hot guys … my friends are into hot guys.” I kiss her on the lips and tell her, “I may not be the most pretty thing to look at, but I like kissing women, and no one will stop me from enjoying that.”

I continue to kiss her. She then tells me, “You and I have to start dating.” We exchange numbers. We continue talking for 30 minutes with intermittent kissing, and she says she must see her friends. I join her. Her friends are getting used to my company. I hold her wallet. All in front of her at eye level, the trust is building up.

Eventually I am left alone with HBC, and she tells me she wants to join her friends. I agree and tell her I will go and do the same. We run into HBG in the process and meet another guy. I stick around for a few minutes, then kiss HBC and head off to see the family.

I am back, impressed with myself, and I chill out with the family. Dance around, joke around, having a grand time. HBC comes back and we start dancing, making out, getting more sexual, and HBG drops a vodka shot in my mouth. Great times. HBC again mentions she wants to get back with her friends. I am cool with it because I am having a grand time with my family.

But here is where it will get interesting.

About 5 minutes after I lose sight of HBC, I look back and I see her with a darker dude who is taller than I, and certainly in better shape than I. They were making out, grinding, and passionate with each other. This is where I finally internalized the following:

1.) A kiss is not something women take too seriously. They like kissing way too much to give it up for a non-committed relationship.

2.) I am the quintessential nice guy that women think they should like. This is what got me the make out session. But I am not the asshole they love to fuck … yet. This game is about switching frames in the right timing. Open, flirt, get a kiss, get sexual. I achieved all of this but I did not fuck her. I did not make her invest enough. I could have legitimately found a spot to get a hand job, finger her, or get a blow job. When the going is good, I am supposed to escalate more.

3.) Never ever take women in a club personally. They love to be approached, worshiped, gawked at, and compared to other women. A make out session is a potential sexual investment, but is certainly not an investment in a long term relationship.

4.) Women are much more conscious of their friends (girlfriends) than they are of their fuck buddies. Regardless of their entourage, temptations will always win.

This was the first time in a long time that I made out with a woman, and I will admit it felt great. I have my doubts I will see her again because she was with another guy, and she wanted some companionship by a guy she should like (me).

I am now confident that make out sessions should be a regular reality for me, because women love to kiss regardless of their friends or relationship status.