I Keep Putting Her Back on the Bed and She Keeps Falling Off
Nice guys pick up girls, bad boys whine and talk about philosophy. Persian Player's advice on cold approaches: mentally challenged guys asking for toothbrushes can be an asset. And so what if she's a drunk, coked-up manic depressive with multiple-personality disorder who can't remember her last STD screening ? She's, like, a 9.5 !
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- David Shade: Masterful Lover Super Conference
- Metalhaze: Zan Interview
- John Murphy: Seduction Explained
- Persian Player: LR
: Bus Cold Approach- SashaPUA: Crazy Korean Sex !
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, I had this Palm application that I had built; I entered the dates at which the girls were menstruating and ended up figuring out, more or less, what their cycles were. It was great, because I knew when to call and when not to bother. The girls thought it was charming that I was always calling when "they were thinking of me." Ah, the magic : ) There's a free tool out there now that does a large part of that. Register your girl for it and it will send you a pleasant e-mail reminder 5 days before PMS starts, along with somewhat helpful suggestions on what to do then (good for a girl you are in a relationship with, but if you do what they propose for an FB, it'll make you look like an apologetic AFC.) Check it out: www.pmsbuddy.com
media.libsyn.com/media/joseph/0062_Zan.mp3
media.libsyn.com/media/joseph/0063_Zan_II.mp3
Pickup is Easier Than We Make It ... Don't be a Nerd
Pick up is easy, and we make it complicated.
I know I've had my whining sessions when things weren't going my way, and I've posted my share of philosophy, but here is my new pick up formula, which is getting me more dates than I know what to do with.
Talk to people
Good body language
Well groomed
Big smile
Great vibe
Meet girl
Tell her I like her
Gauge her reaction (If she's really hot, tease her and knock her down a bit.)
Kino
Isolate
Close (Number, kiss, bounce, fuck, whatever.)
I mean, it seems really complicated, but in the simplest form you go out, talk to hot girls, tell them you think they're hot, move them a few steps out of the sight of their friends, or else befriend their friends, and then close.
Be sincere.
The rest is just logistics.
For a long time, I was trying to be a bad boy, and over analyzing this whole thing. I'm not a bad boy, I'm a nice guy. Now I just tell girls they're sexy and ask them out. It works great. If they reject me, I move on.
All this crazy stuff just gets confusing.
And deep down, all the successful PUAs know this. It's not that complicated.
LR
: Bus Cold ApproachI take the bus on the way to school. There's this cute blonde who's sitting across from me on the right. I'm just listening to music with very open body language. Suddenly, this huge weird black dude sits next to her and starts motioning to her. She turns towards him and asks him what he wants, and he doesn't respond, all he does is point his finger towards his mouth and do a left-right motion.
At some point, I notice she's getting very uncomfortable, so I get up, I go up to him (by the way, I'm sort of looking for trouble these days because of some fighting classes. I love the adrenaline rush) and I say, "Dude, I don't think she wants to talk to you. Do you need help with something ?" He gives me a very non-threatening look and motions the same way. I realize he has probably either escaped from the mental institution, or is on his way there. In any case, he gets up and leaves.
I don't talk to her. I just let her notice me. I sit back down and notice she's getting off at my stop at the University. I get off, tap her on the shoulder, look at her, smile and do the same motion the black guy was doing. She gets really creeped out. I follow up by saying, "No, I'm normal, but what did he want ?"
At this point, I noticed we aren't going in the same direction, even though the conversation is on a high note. Instead of conventionally ending the conversation with, "Well, I hope we see each other later," or some other useless line, I just say, "It was great talking to you, I've got a class to go to, you're cool." She's like, "Persian ! I hope we see each other again."
I know, from this line, that it's a close. This first part of the interaction lasts about 2-3 minutes. By the way, for those of you wondering why I didn't number close her right away, it's because not number closing her right away (if you think you'll see her again) works to your advantage. It builds leverage, and gets her wondering "Why didn't he make a move ?"
A few days later, on the same bus, at the same hour. I sit next to her, I notice she's a bit uncomfortable and not talking, so I get into my usual "Persian" verbal diarrhea. I start talking about relationships right away (because I know every girl loves talking about that stuff.) It's probably my secret weapon. When I get a chance to present my frame to a girl with regards to dating and relationships, it's a guaranteed close. That's the key, you need to be in that moment where you're both in your bubble. At that point, you snipe her with your frame, and she'll fall right into it.
We get to school, and I notice a tattoo on her arm, close to her wrist.
I call 3-4 days later, set-up a date for the next day. Metro next to my place. She's trying to lead the frame, but I tell her, it's going to be my way or my way. She complies.
This is what leading should look like:
Get her to my place, usual routine. Some boring movie so that we can converse. Tell her the whole, "I can't believe you're at my place, I barely even know you," before she has a chance to say it.
Anyway, from there, I just lay down on my bed. Start with some cuddling (which I love) then move on to some kissing and the rest was smooth. This girl was extremely kinky, by the way, loves using her nails real hard when she's coming, and loves biting, screaming, and spitting on your cock while she's sucking it. Never rely on appearances. She seemed like Miss Sunday-Church-Girl.
Anyway, that was that. I wanted to post this just for one reason. The most important thing in cold approaches (unlike night game, where you have to stand out) is to be very normal, casual and friendly. You have to be very subtle and open with something very situational. Something borderline AFC I would say, but from there, be cool, speak to her like she's a friend, and start giving your number once you know she enjoys talking to you.
Crazy Korean Sex !
So I text her around 10 and she’s indecisive about whether she wants to come out or not, etc. She doesn’t wanna go to mine and I can’t go to hers. She says to come meet her and she’ll take me “somewhere.” I ask where, and she says, “Be creative.” I’m thinking she wants to bang me in a park or something ?
She tries to book us into a hotel. I say it’s not necessary, as I live around the corner, but she wants a place that’s “neutral !”
She forgot to bring ID, so we go back to mine.
Then I proceed to have one of the most awkward nights of my sexual life / life.
Where to begin ?
Well, I guess I’ll begin with the coke. She looks at me at one point and says “You wouldn’t think less of me if I do some coke?” And I can safely say the answer was “Nope.”
She does loooooads of it. Like 3 fucking lines at a time until she went through the whole packet. I did like 1 line and I was shaking. I don’t do coke, generally, it has little positive effect on me, and has given me the shakes once before. I was fucked up for around 30 minutes, and she was a bit freaked out. After I took the line, she wanted me to fuck her but I was messed up. I tell her later.
Later on, she denies that she told me I wanted to fuck her. It's always like this with her. She will completely contradict herself all the time, and just talk shit. She says one thing, then the opposite. She gets really coked up and just starts blathering. It's absolutely the most boring shit I’ve ever heard in my entire life, bar none. Try and consider just how bad that is, considering she's one of the most boring girls I have ever met. I mean completely lacking in personality, charisma, charm, or sense of humour. Just absolutely none of that, and add in “completely fucking insane.” Oh, and she’s absolutely stunning. Like model hot. I’d have said 8.5 before, but I was off. Like 9 / 9.5 Oh, and did I mention she’s a manic depressive, is on several anti-depressants, etc. Oh yeah.
So she’s just going on and on and on and I’m trying to, like, I dunno, take some sort of interest. I try and steer the conversation about her, but that doesn’t work. When she asks me to talk, nothing comes into my head. I have absolutely nothing to say to this girl whatsoever. I don’t think I’ve ever been as disinterested in another human being as I am in this girl. I knew this the first time I had her over at my place – that’s why I didn’t fuck her. God I wish I had done it then, so I didn’t have to sit through this shit. My god. And then when I try and tell her something about myself, she doesn’t want to hear it. If it's even slightly sad, she covers up her ears ! She's also the most selfish person I think I’ve ever met. Selfish in bed, too, but just horribly selfish. She even says to me, “You should have fucked me the first time,” and “I’m fucking crazy. You don’t want me in your life – better you ditch me early.” Virtually in those words. So after like an hour of absolutely horrific mental torture, she decides she needs booze in order to get physical, and goes at the vodka. She goes through half the bottle, straight !
She says some very fucked up things to me. “Just tell me what I want to hear and you can do whatever you want to me.” She says, “If you just say one thing to me, I’ll let you fuck me” But no matter what I say, it isn’t the right thing. I ask her what she wants to hear, and she wants me to tell her she’s an amazing girl. I don’t want to lie to her face. “It would help if you would tell me you would fuck me without a condom, because I’d like to believe I’m a good judge of character.” Wow ! “I don’t care if I die tomorrow. Just fuck me.”
At some point, she feels guilty and says, “No, wear a condom, I don’t want to give you anything.”
She's surprised when I asked her the last time she’s been checked. She tells me nobody’s ever asked her that before. I was like what ? And she almost never uses condoms. Holy fuck. It certainly makes my "Do I have shitty condom sex with this girl" decision easy - let me tell you there's no way I'm doing her without, fuck that !
Oh, this is nice – at one point she wants me to be mean to her. She says, “I wish you never told me you didn’t want to hurt me. Be mean to me”
So I tell her the truth. That she is completely boring, I don't like her one bit, and that the only reason she is there is because she's hot and I want to fuck her. And I say I’d never see her again after, and she's like “Ok, but you took it a bit far !”
She says maybe she just wanted to vent to someone about shit outside her social circle, so there would be no repercussions.
Every time I get into it and am about to fuck her, she says, “I want another shot !”
Eventually I do a freeze out and am like, “Look I’m gonna sleep, just go home,” and she's like “No, no, I don’t wanna stop !”
Another sound byte is, “Tell me it’s just sex. Tell me you don’t care about me.” Again, the opposite of the feelings she was trying to elicit before. I think this girl had multiple personality disorder (she’d joked about it once.)
God, this is so fucked up I don’t even wanna write / think about it. Anyway, eventually she’s coked up and hammered and she wants to fuck. She keeps telling me not to use a condom. I’m not really that excited for most of it, and worry about whether I'll be able to get one on – I manage to get a condom on and we go at it. She’s just flopping around like a dying fish. I stop. She keeps falling off the bed. She hits her head on the floor. She's just all over the fucking place going mental, saying, “I’m so fucked up ! Fuck me !” It's creepy. I keep putting her back on the bed and she keeps falling off. Eventually I put her in leg lock and hold her. Get her some water when she wants but she can’t sit up to drink it. Eventually she falls asleep.
In the morning we wake up, and I ask her if she’s ok. She asks if I want to fuck her. She tells me to put a condom on … I’m like, “Yep.” She is already wet. Then I fuck her properly (well, as well as I can with a condom.) It feels ok I guess. I hold the first one, but I just blow my load the 2nd one. Shouldn’t have done that, as I like keeping my boys at home (and have a day 2 today, and Tuesday with the tube girl.)
To be honest it was a waste of sperm. What a nut.
This is just a quick recap of how fucked it was. Fuck, this is the dark side of the PUA – I am just realizing you can pull some crazy motherfuckers into your life. A one night stand would have been so much better, 2 nights with this girl was way, way, way too much. Really, I shouldn't have seen her again after I figured out I just didn't like her, but she was so hot and I'm doing this (all of this) to be able to pull and fuck hot girls - so even though being around her actually went against, well, my very being, I went through with it.
At the end I tell her I have to go (kinda do) and try shoo her out. She makes a joke “Well, I guess you won’t want to see me after this,” and I say “Probably not” and she says “Are you serious ?” Silence … I tell her she’s too crazy for me. She says she knows she’s insane, but that she gets away with it … that's the power of looks right there, ladies and gentlemen (probably just gentlemen ...) Heh.
She just sent me a text as well saying she wants to see me again. Unreal.
Still ... that ass ...
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