2008/10/13

Noooooo, you're not supposed to listen to me...

Rapport is a word you hear everywhere these days. DJ gives us a much-needed analysis of rapport: what it actually means, the various types, the various stages. Not just for seduction, but for any kind of connection! Ice Dragon covers all the essential points of nightclub game, and then illustrates them with his own field report. Persian Player gives us the lay report sequel to his "FR: It may be Love." Find out how he finally succeeds in getting a girl with a boyfriend of ten years into his bed.

HOW TO SUBMIT ARTICLES, COMMENTS, REVIEWS, ETC. TO CLIFF'S LIST: To contribute to Cliff's List, please send an email to cliff@cliffslist.com with your originally written article, dating tips, field report, review, or other comments. Cliff's List focuses on real world romance, seduction and dating advice for men, but aims to assist men in being more successful with women in ways that really work and that women find appealing. Romance, seduction, and dating advice by and for women is also welcome. Cliff's List is designed to introduce you to the wide range of ideas and concepts available which help men improve their relationships and meet women, including learning how to attract women and become skilled as a pick up artist. Cliff's List was mentioned in "The Game" by Neil Strauss ("Style") and presented the original post (made under the pseudonym "Sisonpyh") that was so popular that its author turned it into the Double Your Dating book by David DeAngelo.

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CLIFF'S LIST UPDATES:
Developments to The "Cliff's List Project" are getting much closer. We also will be launching some of the new features on the redone www.cliffslist.com website VERY soon.

BE A REVIEWER FOR CLIFF'S LIST - GET FREE PRODUCTS!
If you are interested in being a reviewer for Cliff's List, here are the requirements: because, in the past I, have given out products to guys who promised a review in exchange but who never actually wrote the review, what I require now is that you send me three (3) reviews of products or events (eg. seminars, home study courses, etc.) that you already have or have attended. Once I see that you are actually writing reviews, then I will send out a product that has been sent to me for review. Once that review is done, I'll send another product, and will keep sending more as long as you are doing a good job with your reviews. If you are interested in being a reviewer for Cliff's List, email cliff@cliffslist.com and I'll send you some pointers on what we want to see in these reviews.

Index To This Edition of Cliff's List
Special Promotions Only For Readers of Cliff's List !!
- DJ Storytelling in VEGAS

Event Announcements
- Savoy Lovesystems SuperConference in Los Angeles
- Zan and Johnny Soporno
- Dr Yen In North America
- Patty LIVE

A Few New Promos
- Matt Huston Getting the Ex Back
- KinoLook up this term Image Consulting
- Dr Paul No More Excuses
- Ron Louis & Dean Cortez and Dating Younger Women
- Scot McKay The Leading Man

Freebies
- Carlos Xuma Interviews Marni
- Zan's Free Teleseminar
- Sinn's Game Acceleration Doctrine
- Art's Free Wingman Service
- David Shade Masterful Lover Free Video

Articles & Content
- Donovan: Worst PUALook up this term Ever!
- M on making it bigger
- Erik on Herbal Viagra
- Ovulu on Managing the Male Sex Drive
- Metalhaze on Alan Roger Currie (Mode One)
- DJ What is Rapport?
- IceDragon Nightclub Tactics
- Zardoz Herd Mentality
- Persian Player LRLook up this term: "You TRYING to have sex with me? Not trying, SUCCEEDING"

SPECIAL PROMOTIONS ONLY FOR READERS OF CLIFF'S LIST!! :
DJ:
If you want to learn how to captivate people with your own life's true stories, then the great news is that there is a process that you can learn, and (with practice) master, that will allow you to communicate on the deepest levels with women, eliminate your need for canned DHVLook up this term material, and leave your audience emotionally touched. And, on October 24-26th, 2008, 30 men will join me in one of the most exciting cities in the world--Las Vegas--to learn how to effectively convey the cool guy that's inside you, and do it in a way that speaks to a woman's Core Attraction Triggers. We are offering a $200 early bird discount for members of Cliff's List. Be sure to get it while it's available! Find out more here: www.storytellingforguys.com/30.htm
Also, check out DJ's blog at www.awakeningjourneys.blogspot.com

EVENT ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Savoy:
There is going to be a Love Systems Super Conference in Los Angeles October 17-19. The Super Conference is where we usually release our newest material, and is an amazing opportunity to work with all of the Love Systems instructors. Other select top dating coaches are also invited, and Sinn and Brad P. are already confirmed. For more information, go to: www.lovesystems.com/super-conference

Zan:
Zan Perrion and Johnny Soporno Introduce...The Secrets of Admirable Lovers (Become a man that women love)
We are doing something special for both men and women in Brussels, Amsterdam, Copenhagen, and Toronto! The Secrets of Admirable Lovers is an interactive four hour seminar, designed for a small audience of men and women. This is an incredible opportunity at an incredible price to see Zan Perrion, Johnny Soporno, and various other guest speakers - in different cities of the world! You will learn many things in this session, including the secrets of the type of men that women love. These visionaries will reboot your entire belief system. All of your questions will be answered, and all of your hesitations addressed, precisely and accurately. All you have to do is look at the track record of these men and the testimonials they have received from men and women all over the world. This evening is not about "picking up chicks". This is simply an incredible opportunity to hear these lovers of women describe the very things you have always wanted to know. This is your chance to hear Zan Perrion, Johnny Soporno, and other guest speakers - in person! Check out the Events schedule at www.zanperrion.com/events.php or at events.worthyplayboys.com/

Clifford:
Dr.Yen is in North America! You've read a few of his posts here and he was instrumental in the famous Project Rockstar. Dr. Yen will be in the following cities and is available to give in field instruction. If you are interested in getting some of the best fast game and live in one of these cities, email me at cliff@cliffslist.com and I will put you in touch with Dr. Yen. He will be at the Superconference in Los Angeles the weekend of October 17th, so get back to me asap. These are the places he is planning on visiting over the next little while:
- NYC
- Washington D.C.
- Philadelphia
- Atlantic City
- Miami
- New Orleans
- Texas
- Las Vegas
- San Francisco
- San Diego
- Los Angeles
For more information about Project Rockstar, go to www.lovesystems.com/blog/?p=1212 To learn about the upcoming Love Systems Super Conference, visit www.lovesystems.com/super-conference

Patty:
Learn how to "Walk the Walk" with Patty LIVE at her Sensuality Secrets Workshop for women in Montreal. Discover the secrets that will help you heighten your sensuality, regain your confidence and unveil the phenomenal woman within you! Join us on October 18th at 10am to 5pm. Sign up here: www.sensualitysecrets.com/workshop.html

A Few New Promos
Matt Huston:
Want to get your ex girlfriend back? The good news is that women all behave in a very similar and predictable manner. Your situation is not at all hopeless. By taking advantage of very specific female psychological "hot buttons", you can cause your ex girlfriend to want you back. It's actually not even that hard if you know what specific buttons to push. But you need to act fast. Statistics prove the longer you wait, the harder it is to get your ex girlfriend back. She'll find another guy to have sex with and that'll be the end of you. This is why you have to take action now and handle your situation fast. www.exgirlfriendguru.com/

KinoLook up this term Image Consulting:
How's your IMAGE? The image experts at Kinowear.com are creating quite the buzz these days with their "fashion for attraction" blog. Jae, the head author, is well-known for his famous 1-on-1 image consultations, where he transforms his clients' styles and really amps up their attractiveness. Rumor has it that they're raising their consultation prices to top-tier industry prices real soon. So if you've ever thought about getting this area of your life in order, NOW IS THE TIME: www.kinoimageconsulting.com/consultation/

Dr. Paul:
There are NO MORE excuses for not achieving what you need to accomplish with dating, relationships and career. If you've been looking for that "kick" to get you into gear, here it is. These essential products from Dr. Paul are instantly downloadable and hold scientific methods for achieving lasting success. Get it here: www.doctorpaul.net/essentials/

Ron Louis & Dean Cortez:
Who else wants to start dating beautiful younger women and feel more youthful and sexually vital? We've got an All-Star team of the top dating & lifestyle coaches in the world, including Zan Perrion, Brent Smith, Sean Stephenson, Savoy, R. Don Steele, Nico Princely, and Carlos Xuma, who share the techniques that get them laid in their personal lives by beautiful younger women! Get it here: youngerdating.com/

Scot McKay:
After you approach a woman and get her number, what comes next? If you actually like her and want to have her stay awhile, you've got to know how to manage relationships. Scot McKay's new program THE LEADING MAN is the first complete system for relationship management—arguably the most important skill when it comes to being great with women. Check out THE LEADING MAN and watch four free videos when you log in. Scot also is rumored to have an unprecedented onslaught of bonuses lined up for guys who get in on his pre-launch list. It's all here: www.the-leading-man.com/ Discover exactly how to "wear the pants"...without losing your shirt.

Freebies
Marni of the WingLook up this term Girl Method has given an interview with Carlos Xuma, listen to it here: www.winggirlmethod.com/Carlos.html

A note from Zan Perrion:
If any of you are interested, I am giving a free 90 minute Teleseminar later this week. It is free because I figure it is the best way to introduce my new program. The program is called "The Ars Amorata: A 90 Day transformation", and I am really stoked that this program is finally coming to life! I have been wanting to create a program like this for a long time. I figured that, rather than write pages and pages of description, it will be easier to just do a free information teleseminar that describes the program in detail. And of course, I will also give a small sample of the concepts I am planning to teach during the actual 90 day program. So it should be a good and informative call. We have a lot of sign-ups for the free call already - just from my newsletter list and website. So we've added more lines to each scheduled call, but even so, space might be limited. www.zanperrion.com/infosession.php

Sinn:
I recently finished my free report on how to actually get good at game. It's called The Game Acceleration Doctrine. It's over 60 pages of my best content to teach guys how to learn this stuff. Download it here: www.sinnsofattraction.com/game_download/

Art:
Need a wingman for night on a town, or some day game, but you cant find one? New free wingman service solves that problem. You can organize your own group in your town, search wingmen in your area or by skill level, post your own outing and events and then blog about your outing. www.SocialWingmen.com, a brand new free service to find wingmen in your area.

David Shade:
Here's the deal: No matter how "nice" a woman looks, chances are that somewhere deep inside her, there's an "inner slut" that desperately wants to come out. Her "inner slut" is the part of her that wants nothing more than to be taken by you. It's the part of her that will BEG you to make hot, passionate love to her every night. Unfortunately, it's also the part of her that most men will NEVER get to see. See, it takes a very special kind of man to make her comfortable enough to show you her "inner slut." It takes a man who can not only make her feel beautiful, loved and special. It also takes a man who can turn her passion on, a man who can give her sexual experiences that she's only dreamed about. If you're interested in learning these amazing sexual secrets from the world's leading sexual pioneer, you owe yourself to check out this free video: masterful-lover.com/sexualpower/

Articles & Content Begin Here
Donovan:

Worst PUALook up this term picture EVER!
www.seduction-chronicles.net/wp-content/uploads/joe_d_pick_up_artist_of_the1.jpg


In Response to Clifford's “Big” Question:

M:
Hey Cliff I saw your question and I've actually seen forums online that are free and full of great info on how to stretch your cock to make it bigger. These guys are really dedicated. Anyways, a friend showed me this stuff and it`s really cool. I am gonna try some of the exercises when I have a slow month and more free time.

www.mattersofsize.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1597

www.thundersplace.com/

I've checked these two sites out and they are really pretty cool. Men helping men...grow.

Erik:
A good friend of mine worked at a company that sold one of these products for a time. They all work on the same principle as Viagra, but use herbal ingredients to avoid FDA regulation. Taking the pills increases blood flow to the area, causing it to swell up to a larger than normal size. The effect is temporary, and you must keep taking the pills each day or it will stop working. Talking to the customer support staff most calls were complaints about shipping or other errors in service, but not the product. Occasionally people would call in with positive reviews as well. The only negative review of the product she was aware of was that a small number of people had complained it caused "purple discoloration." Neither I, nor anyone I know, has used the product personally. This information is based on company literature and what customers reported to the customer service department.


Ovulu:

Responding Henry Makow Ph.D.'s article "Managing the Male Sex Drive"
(www.the7thfire.com/new_world_order/illuminati/Henry_Makow/managing_the_male_sex_drive.htm)

Hello Henry,

Brilliant article...there's a lot of meat here. For me this is golden:

“As if this weren't enough, lately she has become an Amazon warrior anxious to avenge centuries of imagined oppression. As result, she is either frostily unapproachable or a demanding pleasure-seeking slut.”

I find myself having to re-educate women a lot on how to behave because they do not:

a – Know how to project sexual authority correctly.
b - Understand what sex is and to which men they must offer it.
c – Know how to protect themselves from 'rapists' by projecting authority.
d – Know what relationships are for.

(When I tell them, they think I'm some kind of god...rightly so.)

When a woman HITs me on first contact (where H=Hostility, I=Insult/Intimidate, T=Threatens me to leave her alone) simply for saying 'Good Morning' or whatever, she gets the thrid degree right then and there. When a woman, or anyone, does not respond to your dignity, humility and integrity in kind, but with a HIT...it's criminal! I do not care about her insecurities! 'You are going to wash out those insecurities right now,' I tell her. 'Stop acting like a man and listen to me carefully...' A woman must melt, that is our job!

In balance, women as well as men do not know...

1 - Who they are
2 - What they are
3 - Where they are
4 - What value transfers reciprocally when they have sex

They have no idea. Have you ever asked a woman what “boyfriend” means? None of them can ever tell you, and yet they swap their bodies in prostitution in lieu of rent under the aegis of a 'relationship.'

At the end of the day, men must reclaim themselves first, because

AUTHORITATIVE PROJECTION = SEXUAL ATTRACTION

The human mind doesn't discriminate between the two, they are one and the same. That's why a woman seeing a man in 'uniform' will fall to her knees, making crank calls to firestations to get firemen out, hoping to trap them for sex when they swing buy her house.

Dealing with women is all about Authority and making her independant of you. Ironically, the more independant you make a woman for her own good, the more she falls for you.

It's the ultimate gift from a man to a woman.

It's all too easy, just look at insecurities of women today walking the streets. Look at their weak body language that translates into vulnerability attraction for rapists!

Men today are not doing their jobs and women are just falling for the same old Amazonian crap, trying to redeem themselves from a position they can't win.

That's it from me. I'll read more of your stuff. I love it.


Metalhaze:

I've had some correspondence with Alan Roger Currie (Modeone) and he recommended some old school adult and erotic films with assertive and masculine male characters. He gave me these links:

John Holmes, his views on "game:" ca.youtube.com/watch?v=4WY4HnQICVA

John Leslie in “Talk Dirty to Me” I and II. Some good "game" scenes:
badassromantic.blogspot.com/2007/04/mode-one-structure.html

Modeone's backstory: modeone.net/archives/M1-Backstory.html

Interview regarding "Talk dirty to me" and old school adult films with Modeone:
modeone.net/archives/ModeOne_Interview.mp3

And here is Modeone's funclubbing test: modeone.net/archives/FunClub_Test.html

He also recommend a book called "PIMP: The Story of My Life" by Iceberg Slim. It's a good read even for entertainement purposes:
(www.amazon.ca/Pimp-Story-Life-Iceberg-Slim/dp/087067935X/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1222961969&sr=1-1)

BTW have you seen the series "Californication" with David Duchovney? (www.amazon.ca/Californication-Season-1/dp/B0013ZGN9I) The character he portrays (Hank Moody) has great behavior with wome. The second season has started already. You can watch the episoes streaming online. It's like the male version of "Sex and the City." (fsturl.com/CT)


What is Rapport?
by DJ (www.storytellingforguys.com/30.htm)


Have you heard the term "rapport" tossed around? It's become a somewhat loaded word these days. We're told you need rapport to sleep with a girl, you need rapport to land a client, to get out of a ticket, etc. Essentially rapport is a necessity for anything friendly, romantic, or persuasive in nature.

I'm assuming you have also heard that in a romantic connection you must have attraction before rapport. Certainly, in a high energy environment such as a bar, this is true. If you don't have attraction or at least interest, you won't have a conversation.

However, have you ever heard of a relationship or marriage that didn't happen this way? Perhaps they were friends or acquaintances first. If you must have attraction before rapport, how could our parents' generation have produced us? Well, the complement to the attraction-rapport model is something I call "The Connection Paradigm." Most natural romances happen with rapport first and through connection grows attraction. Within yin there is yang and within yang there is yin. So, within connection, there certainly can be attraction, right? I've seen this happen so many times that it bewilders me that more people don't discuss it.

Of course, there can be rapport within attraction as well. Both models are right and correct. Opening to the possibilities in The Connection Paradigm, however, will empower your success in relationships by giving you a new setLook up this term of tools.

Rapport, stripped of all of its bells and whistles, is simply a connection between two people. There are four ways this happens:

Wide Rapport occurs when people share a variety of similarities. For example, let’s say you are talking with a stranger and you realize that you both like the same music, and then you discover that you both have a mutual friend, and not too long after that, you find that you both worked at the same fast food chain when you were young. This is an example of wide rapport, and it’s fairly easy to establish. The key is to ask the right questions, listen to the answers, and to tell stories from your life until commonalities arise.

Deep Rapport happens when you discuss one topic, at length, with someone. Let’s say you meet someone at marketing convention. You make small talk and then you discover that you graduated from the same university and had the same marketing professors. You spend all of your time together discussing your memories of school. This is deep rapport. It’s easy to get as soon as you find a strong commonality and explore that commonality with stories and questions

Familiarity Rapport is a result of spending a lot of time with someone. Ever have a case where you didn’t like someone at work and then over time you just found yourself developing a fondness for them? This is a result of what happens when people spend quantity time together. A great example is the story of how many of our parents met…often, mom didn’t initially like dad but dad stuck around and eventually mom fell for him. That was the case with my parents! When two dogs meet, there is a mechanism that evaluates “friend or not friend.” It is the same with us, and with women especially. The first thing that she evaluates is “creep or not creep” which really boils down on a more primitive level to threat or not threat. Our physiology is wired to become comfortable with familiarity. The first thing that happens is that we realize there is no threat. After this happens when we are no longer on guard, we become open to potential commonalities. Familiarity rapport is worth keeping in mind when you are on a date and are looking for the balance between pushing things too quickly and waiting too long.

Emotional Connection Rapport is a really important one. This happens as a result of shared vulnerabilities. For example, have you heard stories of complete strangers who helped each other during the 9/11 terrorist attacks and became best friends? A short moment in time produced enough shared vulnerability to create an unbreakable bond. Oftentimes the bonds that form through this kind of rapport are truly unbreakable and the connections last a long time. You can share this kind of rapport by communicating on the level of values. Do this by being willing to open yourself up a bit and by asking questions that elicit values. Values are the core qualities that drive people, that motivate their behaviors. People who share similar values naturally have a deep bond.

How Bonding Happens

Have you seen the movie Before Sunrise? This movie is a wonderfully crafted example of how natural chemistry is generated. It’s also strikingly similar to an experience I had with a girl in Europe. Connections, especially male-female connections, progress through three stages of connection:

Environment: Natural meetings often happen via introduction or by commenting on some commonality in the environment. This is why the weather is such a universal topic of conversation – it’s something we all experience. In Japan, it is customary to begin a letter with a sentence about the weather. Opening a conversation with a stranger with a comment about something in the environment is a safe and effective way to begin. But if the conversation stays there, not much rapport will be formed.

Commonality: This is where the connection begins to progress through wide and deep rapport. After connecting on the level of environment, the next stage of deepening rapport is to discuss commonalities. So, after commenting on the weather, perhaps you or the other person make a comment or ask a question that lends to realizing that you have something in common. As a hypothetical example, perhaps you ask: “What brings you out to the bookstore today?” “I was just looking for some information on yoga.” If you also have an interest in yoga, you’re off and running. Or maybe you comment: “You have an energy and grace about you that suggests you are involved in creative movement…a dancer perhaps?” Then, when you learn she does yoga, you have a commonality built.

Values: All authentic and deep connections must progress to the level of values. Men, as a general rule, are much more hesitant to open at this level because we are afraid to be vulnerable. But there can be no true connection without a sharing on the values level. So, continuing our example above, let’s say that you comment: “The thing I love about yoga is how free is allows me to feel, and I love how women who do yoga tend to be really creative and expressive with their bodies and their movement. What is it that yoga allows you to feel?” As you discuss each answer and continue moving deeper into exploring the topic, you will connect on the level of values.

Watch Before Sunrise and see if you can follow this progression.

Remember, rapport and connection generate trust, and trust is absolutely essential for any sort of give and take relationship, whether it be romantic or otherwise. Attraction is important, of course. But attraction without connection is void of trust and leads to flaking.

Understanding and mastering rapport will take you very far. A great way to build rapport with others is through personal storytelling. To make your stories really powerful, end them with what I call a “values ending.’ You do this by sharing what the experience meant to you, what it taught you, what you gained from it. For example, “And what that experience gave me was a new perspective on life, it showed me that it is possible to do anything I want and that I can be the creator of my own destiny, which gave me an unparalleled sense of personal freedom.”

And then you will naturally and quickly be communicating on the values level.


Nightclub Tactics
by IceDragon (www.TipsForDatingLadies.com):

The nightclub is a unique venue, and one rich with opportunities for meeting women. The key is to use your body language and alpha male characteristics. The women in nightclubs are there to meet men. They may say that they are going ‘dancing’ or ‘hanging out,’ but that is all bullshit. Why else would they spend hours and hours putting on make-up and getting ready? They want the attentions of men.

Sociability and Attitude

When you are in a club, make yourself at home in that environment. If you don’t enjoy bright lights and loud music, it’s tough. Force yourself, since that is a targetLook up this term rich environment you need to get used to. Eventually you will enjoy it. The trick is to be sociable and friendly to everyone. Act as if you own the venue, and have fun, without focusing on ‘getting a girl.’ Women will notice you, and will be far more receptive to your advances.

Try and give out some sort of value to the people you are talking to. Greet people warmly, tell a couple of jokes. When you give out value, people want to be around you, and you will become much more interesting than staring at a glass of wine, or watching other people dancing. The way to give out value is to lose your outcome dependence. However, later on, I’ll explain that outcome focus is a separate part of nightclub game . . .

Talk to men, talk to fat, ugly girls. Make them laugh, show them a good time! This will build up your energy, and other, hotter girls will notice a buzz of energy around you, and wonder who you are. This is very powerful.

Don’t be afraid to ‘intrude.’ Go ahead and chat to them, they’re in a club, and they’re here to be sociable. Give them a high-five, shake the guy’s hand. Touching is good, as long as it’s not sleazy, creepy touching. Human beings instinctively want to be touched, and it creates a stronger bond between people. If you practice touching regularly, it will seriously blow your mind. You may think that it would be weird, but I have been doing this for years, in all situations, not only in nightclubs. I always put my hand on a guy’s shoulder when shaking his hand – I have been told that this feels as if I am being very sincere. I often high-five random teenagers in the street, I gently hold a woman’s wrist while I am shaking her hand, and I often hug women I have just met. I brush my hand against their cheeks when they say something cute. People love this. It exudes confidence, humanity, sincerity and empathy. Live life to the full, and start touching women. After all, you ultimately want to get her naked in your bed and fuck her. So start touching now to let her know what’s coming. In a club, it is twenty times easier to get into more advanced touching. Randomly hug girls, hold their hands, play little thumb-war games, read their palms. Any excuse.

Here’s an exercise to try out. This week, starting from tomorrow, touch 10 random women per day.

Don’t react to others. This is known as being ‘unreactive.’ A person only reacts to someone they are attracted to or feel threatened by. An alpha male does not react, but gets reacted to. If someone is rude to you, let it go. If a waitress or a bus conductor is not polite to you, smile, thank him/her, and let it go. Tell them the service is phenomenal for Chrissake. But do not ever, ever, ever react. Rise above that. In clubs, women will test you by ignoring you, asking you questions, turning their bodies away, etc. If you’re content, super-confident and at ease in your own skin, you will be unaffected, thus creating powerful attraction.

It is your job to create a buzz, a vibe that people want to be part of. You’re a confident, cool guy, out to have fun, you’re not outcome dependent. You’re not needy or desperate. You’re not in a club to chase women. When a woman turns her back to you, she is testing you to see if you will do a 360 degree turn and clamor for her attention. Do not do this. Turn away yourself, and talk to someone else. The girl will wonder what the hell happened, and will want to know who the fuck you are!

Similarly, do not lean in, or ‘peck’ into a girl when talking. This will signify to her subconscious mind that you are a low value male, or have a lower social value to her, and she will get rid of you. Your aim is to intrigue and attract the girl, not to chase her like 99.9% of the other guys do. You’re not ‘trying’ anything. You’re ‘doing’ what you do best—being a confident, powerful alpha male, meeting a woman in a natural way and having fun. You are merely creating an environment to meet a woman at a level pegging.

Repeat these affirmations loudly before going to a club. Do it in the car on the way to the club:

"Concentrate on projecting my masculine, alpha self."

"I assume attraction wherever I go, and women fall at my feet."

"I'm imposing my alpha male attitude and beliefs on you."

"My confident, alpha male self attracts any woman I want."

“I have power and choice with women.”

In time, you will reprogram your subconscious mind.

Value Giving versus Value Taking

Women are attracted to alpha males, confident but not brash or arrogant. Visualise yourself constantly being approached by ugly, unattractive girls. When women are constantly surrounded by supplicating, needy beta males, that’s how they feel. Constantly being offered free drinks, being asked interview style questions, being asked their ‘name,’ or if they ‘come here often.’ That is not value giving behaviour, but value taking behaviour. Women do not place as much emphasis on looks, like men do, They look for behaviour and attitude. This is what will setLook up this term you apart from other guys, and this is why you will succeed. It's like taking a gun to a knife-fight.

There are very few alpha males in a nightclub. If you put your core identity on the line, and give value, you won’t have to buy a woman a drink just to talk to you ever again. If you are both getting on well, then there is no harm in buying her a drink, but only for the right reasons. You will never have to beg women to stay with you a little longer, never have to ask for her phone number. Women will thrust their numbers and their bodies into your lap. Women will want to be with you. I get women competing for my attention, women who work hard to get me. Last night, I made out with a girl who was still holding her boyfriend’s hand. Yes, it is possible. This is what women are hard-wired to do. They are built to respond, to align with an alpha male.

Don’t deceive a woman about what you really want, about what your true intentions are, and you gain respect, trust, and most importantly, attraction.

Case study: IceDragon in a Nightclub

Read this study for examples of how sociability can increase your status inside a nightclub, and memorize the pointers.

Ok, Saturday night, after going to a wedding, my girlfriend and I met up with her friends, and they wanted to go to a club. I said 'cool.' On the way, my girlfriend felt sick and said she was going home. She hadn't been feeling well earlier that day, so it was understandable. I said I would take her home, but her friends wanted me to go with them, and my girlfriend said she would get a taxi.

Now, I treat her friends like I would treat bratty little kid sisters. Constantly teasing them, using cocky funny lines, etc. They couldn't stop giggling around me, and naturally wanted to be in my company.

Guys, remember this point:

1. An alpha male who gives value and does not seek anything in return is very attractive to women.

Well, we decided to go to a club called Kushion. There I was, walking in with 9 absolutely stunning Chinese girls. Every pair of female eyes was on me, and the guys gave me this 'who is this' look, whilst drooling at the girls.

These days, I don't actively go out to sargeLook up this term anymore. For learning it's ok, but in order to get to a higher level of game, and to attain those 'unattainable' girls, you have to work on your social proof game, or as Adam London would put it, 'Entourage Game.'

Sure, it's ok to go to a club with your WingLook up this term, and do setLook up this term after setLook up this term for practice, but true naturals don't do that. They go to a club with a group and enjoy themselves. For bootcamps, obviously, I still advocate doing setLook up this term.

2. Be a sociable leader with a lot of friends. Go out with a large group, preferably lots of hot girls.

We got into the club, and we found a place to sit on one of those couches (well, three of those couches!) with me in the centre.

Two of the girls went to the toilet, and almost immediately, two hot blondes came and sat next to me. One opened me with, 'So, who are you with?' I looked at her, raised my eyebrows, glanced at the girls, then looked back at her. She laughed, and asked me my name. I told her, then we got into a conversation.

As we were talking, her friend said she was going to the bar, and asked me if I wanted something. I asked for a Double Jack Daniels and Coke.

The girl started to touch me.

Another point:

3. When a girl opens you, you already have attraction. Don't try and impress the girl. Start making her comfortable. Ask deep questions, personal questions, and talk about your own life. No, not about the mole on your leg!

The other two girls came back, one of them sat on my lap, then other sat opposite me, and asked me to finish off the story I was telling them on the way to the club. It was some story about this guy who was dry-humping some fat girl in a club once. Not really that funny, but the girls were lapping it up.

4. Don't be afraid of other guys - and don't take shit

Then two guys came up and started talking to the blondes. One of them started chatting to one of my girls, who blanked him, and turned her back to him. He then took the blonde girl's umbrella, and tried to hook it to the back of her belt, at which point I shouted 'oi.'

He immediately apologised, and the blondes, who weren't that into him and his mate, went cold on them. Never take shit from guys.

People can sense that I am more than capable of responding if they resort to violence. That's why I never get threatened by other males. After years of going out in Glasgow I've never been in a single fight in a nightclub or on the street, since I tell it as it is.

5. Chill out on the dance floor. Use girls to get other girls

We were chatting, when this girl comes up to me and said 'My friend wants to know if you'll get off with her.'

What the fuck. I said, 'Who is your friend?', she replied 'Come on, I'll take you to her.' I was about to politely decline, when two of the Chinese girls grabbed my arms and dragged me off to the dancefloor.

I spent some time sandwiched in between two hot girls, having a laugh, and noticed this brunette eyeing me up, and edging closer.

6. Proximity - If a girl comes close to you, it's no coincidence. She's interested.

I grabbed the brunette's hand, and we danced for a while. Then, she came closer, and kissed me!

Needed another drink, so I went to the bar. This guy stopped me and said 'Mate, do you need some help with all those girls?' I laughed and said 'Come on over and say hi.' He seemed like a nice guy, and if I could introduce him into my circle and get him laid, why not?

7. An alpha male protects his friends, and does not feel threatened by other males. Be a leader.

Anyway, I got my drink at the bar, had a couple of throwaway conversations at the bar, got a number-close from this Polish girl, who had these gorgeous eyes.

The blonde and her friend was leaving, but she asked me for my number before she went. Imagine that - hot girls opening you, and number-closing you. That's the power of social standing, and the power of being in control of your group.

About the author:
IceDragon has been described as the "grandmaster of natural seduction" and is the acclaimed author of (Real Attraction Secrets). He has been a regular contributor to Cliff’s List over the years.[/URL].


Herd Mentality
by Zardoz:

Don't follow the herd. Bring something unique to the table. Walk your own way. Ignore the rules.

Guys, we need to understand that many of the rules laid out in this community are guidelines. I know the advanced guys have preached this to the hills, but I spent a good chunk of time hanging out with "PUALook up this term's in training," and many follow the guru guidance as gospel advice.

Stuff like:
3 second rule
Neg the targetLook up this term
Back turn
iod after ioiLook up this term
Don't scan the venue
Only touch to reward
Approach indirectly
Approach directly
Never buy drinks
Don't go on coffee dates
Don't say "I like you"
Don't drink (it's up to you, but don't rely on it for state)
Looks don't matter
You need to look cool
etc

Back to herd mentality

Originality is what setLook up this terms you apart from the mass. Use this to your advantage in field. Wear your weird clothes, say what you really feel, swing from the rafters, sing bad 80's songs.

Embrace your uniqueness, but be prepared for the consequences. You will separate yourself from others, and they won't like you for it. Not until it's internalized. Once you embrace your uniqueness, and learn to let it shine, people will flock just to be in your presence.


LRLook up this term: "You TRYING to have sex with me? Not trying, SUCCEEDING"
by Persian Player

This is just the sequel to my "FRLook up this term: It may be Love."

I had to post this one. This is one of the girls I've connected with the most in my life; everything natural. I never tried to create the connection, it was one of those rare occasions where you meet a girl you really connect to.

Lesson learned: don't ever get into your head too much. I saw a problem where there was none. In retrospect, she was giving me all the signs, I was just assuming she was playing games. It's never a good idea to get into the woman's head, solely worry about your own reality, let her deal with her own.

I also realized that these days, when I have sex with women, I don't really feel validated anymore. It feels too normal. I guess that's the way it should be. Things are much more stable now in the spectrum of emotions I feel.

This girl's been with her boyfriend for 10 years now and tells me that she feels he's the guy who loves her the most in life. He's a bit older and clearly providing for her.

What she misses in her life is passion and adventure. That's where I came in.

Over the past few weeks, I saw this girl (call her Clara) many times in different situations. Being the overcomplicated guy that I am, I always try and overgame or play things safe in order to ensure they work out. Unfortunately, oftentimes some women don't play that many games when they're ready; it's just a question of leading them through. Of not-fucking-things-up.

I would see her in 2 of my classes and I would send her mixed messages; that is, very sweet some days, very aloof other days. I however refrained from doing something destructive which I used to do in the past at school: I didn't purposely game other girls in front of her in order to rub it in her face and hopefully make her jealous. I've realized that's completely unnecessary because it only makes you come off as a player, and deep down, every woman, even ones I've has one night stands with, want to feel respected and special.

Also, last weekend I was down in the US for a car show and I thought of her while I was shopping, so I picked up something small (in order, of course, not to come off as some provider.) It was a small bottle containing bath salts. The idea was to get a casual gift that she would use while she is naked. Something that would connect thinking about me while she's naked, taking her bath. You'll see how this worked later on.

A few days ago she gave me a lift to my place, and in the car she asked me:

Her: So what did you do over the weekend?
Me: Do you want the censored or uncensored version of things?
Her: Uncensored.
Me: Are you sure you'll be able to handle it?
Her: Are you seeing anyone?
Me: Why? Are you seeing anyone?
Her: Umm, no. (She has a 10 year boyfriend, she's just playing to get an answer out of me and I kept eluding the question.) But seriously, answer my question.
Me: I will opt for my right to remain silent.
Her: (Her vibe clearly became cold.)
Me: Awww. I got you pissed.
Her: No, I'm not pissed at all. I feel great. (We all know what it means when a woman does that, she's just denying what she's feeling in order to pretend like she's not affected by you)
Me: You're cute.
Her: (she stayed silent)
That day we both had things to do at 5pm, and it was 4pm, so I told her to stop at a nice park on the way to handle her emotional need (feeling special.)

We got to the park and I found a quiet spot under a tree with red fall leaves. It was drizzling and mildly windy. I said to her:

Me: When you asked me if I was seeing anyone and I avoided your question, I clearly felt like you were affected by that.
Her: No, never mind, it's none of my business anyway.
Me: It's not a question of business; it's a question of feeling comfortable and at ease to talk when we're together. We're friends.
Her: Hmm.
Me: Listen, we're not seeing each other seriously. If I were to meet a woman and I enjoyed talking to her, I won't lie to you, I would probably exchange numbers with her. But I want to tell you ONE thing (and this is very true by the way.) At the present time in my life, you're the only woman I've met with whom I have such a deep, natural and meaningful connection.
Her: Really.
Me: Really. And I know deep inside my heart that you enjoy spending time with me just as much as I enjoy spending time with you. I know you want me to hold you as much as I want to hold you myself, I know you want to feel my lips brushing against your lips as much as I want to kiss you.
Her: Omg, stop.
Me: I already told you. I don't expect anything from you other than your positive vibe, which you naturally have. I understand you have a boyfriend and that you love him, and I truly wish you all the best with him.
Her: You're the first guy I've met that says this. Most guys in the past asked me to break up with my boyfriend to be with them.
Me: How selfish would I have to be to ask that from you? I live day by day and want to ensure your life remains enjoyable even when I'm not around. Whether you're with your boyfriend or not doesn't bother me one bit, because what I love is not to possess you, it is simply to enjoy your presence next to me. If your boyfriend puts a smile on your face, I want you to stay with him. We don't even know each other enough to be in a relationship anyway. Relationships take time. We only know one thing, we have a natural and passionate connection and we both want to share this feeling together, by kissing each other, holding each other, making love, and doing all sorts of other crazy things together. (My game consists of talking quite a bit, and a lot of people tell me I talk way too much, but my mindset is better safe than sorry. I present to the girl what to expect so that things go smoothly.)
Her: Yeah…
Me: There's only one thing, Clara. When I'm with you, I sometimes feel as though you have a wall up, and it really hurts me to know that you resist to me even though you want me as much as I want you. (The idea is to keep suggesting that she wants you as much as you want her, so you're both chasing, it's not a unilateral act).
Her: I understand. I don't want you to be on hold.
Me: I don't feel on hold. I just want you to make a grown-up decision about this. I don't care what happens between us, I'll like you as a person regardless, but if you can't let go while you're with me, then I'd rather not spend any more intimate time with you. How do you feel about all this?
Her: I want you really bad, but I'm afraid of being hurt.
Me: I understand. (I hug her)
I suggest we leave and we go back to the car. As she's driving, we stop at a red light, and all of the sudden some idiot bumps into her car from behind. I get out of the car mad and I'm ready to knock the guy out. Then I saw nothing happened with the car, and the guy is being very apologetic and sweet. I get back into the car.

Her: You're being aggressive!
Me: Too much testosterone I guess.
Her: Just breathe! Or have sex or something.
Me: Hahaha
Her: Let's go have sex (Yeah, she really said this, but it was obviously not going to happen, we both had things on our schedule)
Me: I'm not having sex with you right now.
Her: Why?
Me: 1. I have no condoms, 2. I have no lube, 3. I don't want to fall asleep because I have a martial arts class soon, 4. I don't want to share my aggressiveness with you.
Her: OMG.
She drives me and I take off giving her a kiss on the cheek. I never tried going for the kiss on the lips.

The next evening, I get home after a tax class at 11:00pm. I text her with "Clara?" She texts back with "Yes hun?" I never respond because DIEHARD calls me. While I'm talking to DIEHARD, she calls me. I tell DIEHARD I'm going to take her call to see what's up.

I ask her where she is. She says she just finished work (she works at a restaurant not far from my place.) I don't suggest anything. I keep teasing the shit out of her. I complain about how cold it is outside. I keep telling her she looks like an elf (God knows how I come up with this weird shit.) She gets angry and she says, "I'm coming over to smack you." I say "You threatening me?" She says "Yes." I ask her where she is and tell her to come by for 10 minutes because I want to get some sleep. She says ok, for 10 minutes.

She rings my doorbell and I open up. I hide in the staircase and jump at her while she's coming up. She's scared shitless and I say, "Happy early Halloween." She's clearly feeling super emotional.

I think to myself, as long as she's feeling emotional I can escalate.

I get her to my place. I've stuck a paper saying "Welcome Elf." She gets pissed in a playful way. I start showing her some funny ass videos on youtube. I have a collection of the best and funniest/most controversial videos online. Instead of being focused on her, I'm focused on the videos.

I keep noticing, while turning back (she's seated on my bed – there's nowhere else to sit but my desk chair – my place is setLook up this term up in an interesting way) that she's looking at my lips and biting and licking her own (it's extremely subtle.) I ignore it.

She tells me it's been 10 minutes already. I say, “No it's been 12 minutes, weren't you supposed to get the fuck out after 10?” Her jaw drops. I love using this kind of assholish humor when a girl tests me.

I get close to her (I had fixed myself a fruit flavored shisha and I offer her some) and I start smelling her, gently touching her, and holding her.

B'lair (a respected lair member) told me to take my time before escalating and not simply go for the lips right away. Transition into it slowly. Start kissing the cheek, then the ear, then the neck, then back to the cheeks, etc. Make it natural and sensual.

I start making out with her and she says she has to go. I tell her she can leave anytime and move away. I was trying to see if it was momentary resistance or definite resistance. She's not leaving. I go back and we make out some more.

Before I go on into how I escalated, let me say that of ALL the girls I've slept with, this is the one that gave me the most "Nos, stops, don'ts, and we-shouldn't-do-this's."

I escalate linearly, and I keep getting the same "stops and don'ts." At some point, instead of just barreling through, I gently stop and say “It's ok, we don't have to do this.”

She says "NO, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY." Hahaha.

I say to her, "So do me a big favor and just keep quiet, let me be in charge."

It escalates more until I'm fingering her, at which point I magically take out a condom. She says:

Her: Are you trying to have sex with me?
Me: No, I'm not trying. I'm succeeding.
Her: (She gently slaps me on the shoulder.)
The rest was easy. I talk a lot during sex and she loved it. I told her how I'd text her in class and fuck the living shit out of her in the school bathroom. She said she can't wait, etc.

Anyway, we'll see what happens with this. I'm not in a rush for a relationship, but I know that I really enjoy the vibe I get from this girl.

Before she left, she checked her cell phone. The boyfriend had called something like 24 times. It doesn't matter, with what I'm offering her, I could only make her relationship better. She now has a provider (him) and a lover (me.)

Questions asked:

When were you first attracted to me?

After 12 minutes of talking to you.

When did you first think of sleeping with me?
When I first came over to your place and when I used the bath salts you gave me to take a bath.

Quote:

Her: Stop, I don't want us to have sex tonight.
Me: You're right, we won't do this tonight.
Her: Noooooo, you're not supposed to listen to me...

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