SPECIAL EDITION: CARLOS XUMA INTERVIEW
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MORE NEWS!!
DAVID X. SEMINAR ANNOUNCEMENT!!
Now it's time to make your plans for the spectacular David X. Seminar.
On Valentine's Day Weekend February 10, 11 & 12, 2005 in Downtown Toronto at the Bond Place Hotel (bondplacehoteltoronto.com/), Be Relentless Inc. will be presenting David X. in a brand new exclusive seminar. There will be some very exciting surprises at this event, including a hot party featuring some of the hottest women in Toronto. More details are up at the newly redesigned website www.be-relentless.com.
David will be elaborating on his unique strategies and ideas and doing some personal analysis to give hands-on explanations of how he deals with the complexities and intricacies of dealing with women. More on this on the website.
Sign up NOW and take advantage of the discount available for early registration. Hotel rooms are available directly from the hotel at a specially discounted rate of $89 per night Canadian plus taxes and hotel fees.
Carlos Xuma Interview:
Clifford: Carlos is the "guru" behind Dating Dynamics, Seduction Method and Alpha Seduction (visit his websites at www.alphaseduction.com, www.seductionmethod.com & www.datingdynamics.com).
Carlos, thank you for agreeing to do this interview with me and now could you please tell a little about your history with women, and your background.
Carlos: I grew up in the Northeast, in Upstate New York. And the first thing I remember about girls was liking them - a LOT. I got started at a very early age, too. My first real crush was in kindergarten with a girl in my class named Julie. My mom even helped me pick out a gift to bring in to school for her. Of course, the thing sat all wrapped and ready in the book rack under my chair while I worked up the guts to give it to her, fearing the awful possibility of her rejection. Julie never did get that gift. Sorry, babe. That pattern of serial crushes on girls kept up for me for a while. I first got laid when I was only 12 years old. Her name was Ann, she was 15, and she'd had a crush on me for a while. I'd held off on "dating" her, which only made her more interested. I remember that she told my friends she wouldn't "do it" with me until after we dated for a month. We did it the next afternoon.
It wasn't long after that I was sleeping with every girl I could get my hands on. What I was doing at the time (but didn't realize) was being a real 'scoundrel.' I would sleep with a girl, and then move on to the next one in a few weeks or so. I was a self-interested "jerk," just like the ones women complain about (but keep going back to.) My selfish attitude communicated my non-neediness, as well as my social value. I just kept being self-interested and treated women like *I* was the prize.
In a nutshell, my attitude was this: "Oh, you're going to sleep with me. And if you don't, I'm just going to move on to a woman who will. And then it will be YOUR fault. Oh, and you're not just going to SLEEP with me. You're going to do all the nasties I want, too. Now get naked."
Still, the seeds of my setback to a "Nice Guy" were planted in my early twenties when I started reading a TON of self-help literature. I started with the usual Anthony Robbins material, Wayne Dyer, Napoleon Hill, etc., which were fantastic for my entrepreneurial spirit and desire to grow and achieve. I've always been fascinated by human motivation and drive.
I also wanted to know more about how this thing called "love" worked, and how to have a successful relationship. Unfortunately for me, I also started reading every book under the sun on relationships by all the female (and male) authors and pundits. I started believing in this "ideal" that these people perpetuated, which was arguing against our emotional nature. What I started believing in was this "pure white light of love and acceptance", all this "California New Age" bullshit that they said you could experience if you explored and confused your inner child enough.
WHAM. My game started going right down the toilet.
I stopped making women attracted to me the way I had been with my 'scoundrel' attitude, and I started believing I'd been doing wrong to them all that time, and that men were "bad." I became something of a male feminist. (Ugh, I cringe thinking back on this.) I acted the complete role of the nice guy, from buying them flowers to writing love letters.
After several heart wrenching ordeals with a few of my long term relationships (yeah, they dumped me), I knew I had to get back on track.
I actually started with a short book that was on the back shelf of a small bookstore (as most good information usually is.) The book was "How to be the Jerk Women Love" by F.J. Shark. It wasn't exactly a new bible of getting women, and it had so many printing flaws that I imagined this was published by someone in a basement somewhere after a hard drinking binge. BUT this book started me understanding that women are not attracted to LOGIC. They are attracted to certain behaviors that evoke their EMOTIONS. And while the tactics in this book weren't all spot-on (like always borrowing money from your girl and having centerfolds on your wall), the principles held up. I knew there was much more strategy to find and use.
So after a few more years of experimenting, getting back on track with my dating and sex life, and looking into a ton of other stuff out there, I knew I could write my own book using my experiences and insights. Combining my analytical ability with my writing skills, I had no doubt that guys would want this information. I first came out with "The Dating Black Book" about two years ago. Then "The Seduction Method" came out six months later. I've been providing regular advice and strategies for men in my monthly audio coaching. And just this month I released my most recent book and 6-CD series, "Secrets of the Alpha Man."
My highly analytical nature led itself to "figuring out" women and our interactions to understand what this thing of sexual attraction was all about. I'm one of those guys who just has to know how things work, whether it's mechanical or social interaction.
Lately, my experiences as a Martial Arts instructor has led me even deeper into the dynamics of what makes a man an ALPHA. It's a term that's been over-used and abused, but there is so much to learn by studying what kind of men women have desired over the eons. I just worked on molding this definition for the modern man.
We're in a genuine crisis in our society as far as gender roles, and my mission is to turn this situation around for men (and women). The Nice Guy Syndrome is destroying the success of men everywhere, and it's time to put that to an end.
Clifford: One thing I have noticed from the last few interviews I have been doing is that each person (not that this is a revolutionary realization) has their own particular style of seduction. What this means is that each person has found the path doing what they do to achieve success. I think you've explained what you were doing as a teenager, but now that you are an adult what do you do to create attraction that might be different from other guys or that would define your particular method or methods.
Carlos: I'm more of a sniper than a "sarger" if you know what I mean. I used to just go after women as they came, but now I find more fun and challenge in being a hunter. I find the target
that interests me and I shoot to kill. More like Valmont from "Dangerous Liaisons."
Each woman is a case study, and has a puzzle to getting her particular "kill shot." And I believe most guys are really looking for more than temporary successes. The challenge eventually comes when he wants one good woman instead of many.
But I think the differentiation is that I'm targeting keeping the 80/20 rule in mind. 80% of guys are barely surviving out there in the seduction world, running around without a clue but what their moms told them.
80% of success is in only 20% of the skills, and they're very easy to learn, and almost all of them come as a result of having a full and confident lifestyle. I also hone in on the importance of living an Alpha Lifestyle BEFORE you go out and look to pickup and seduce.
In the case of seduction, however, the 80% is probably more like 95% of guys who are not very skilled at the nuances of dating and seduction, but you know what I mean. I also believe firmly in using skills that are NATURAL rather than complexly orchestrated. The architecture is the same, but it has to be flexible enough to adapt to each guy's personality. Techniques are fine, but ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING.
Keep it simple. No trance words, no cleverness until you get the foundational understanding, beliefs, and skills. There's no lasting success in life without a true feeling of good self-esteem.
Clifford: How about some specific examples of what you think about, how you prepare yourself to "snipe", and what may go on between you and some of your targets. If you can, please walk through the process that usually results in your having a success with a woman.
Carlos: I've gone through a LONG and intense process of cleaning up my inner game over the years. One of the things that my breakdown in skills has taught me is that the most important thing is your belief in your own value.
If you go out on a "date" or meet a woman out somewhere, she wants to believe in you. Most people aren't strong leaders. Women, however, are looking for leaders to follow, which equates to your value as a man. Your social rank defines your value in most ways. (Yes, there is a whole subculture of socially reclusive people out there, but even they are still attracted to a certain set of attitudinal traits.)
The more you believe in yourself, the more you will act independently of a woman's perception, thus driving up your value in her eyes. After all, what kind of man doesn't need her approval? The kind of guy that SHE needs approval from. That's what draws her in. Her belief that he is more powerful than she is.
Now, I've long since grown tired of the "singles" scene here in San Francisco. I used to work the bars and parties there pretty hard. Lately, however, it's become much more interesting to find the challenging targets and use my sniping ability with them.
First of all, let me say that I find almost ALL women attractive in some way. Femininity and everything about women is something I adore. You have to if you're going to stay in the game for a long time. You can't run around with the typical male anger syndrome. You know, the one that's pissed because women appear to control the sex, and since you're not getting any, it must be the collective fault of all women. (This kind of anger is more common than most people think. Not necessarily to the level that causes men to be violent rapists, as the media would have you believe, but enough to sabotage a lot of guys from getting the sex life they want.)
I really don't prepare for sniping. I just keep my eyes open for a woman that fascinates me enough to keep around. Here's an example:
Every Halloween here in San Francisco there's a huge celebration in the Castro district. It's a big party in the street with everyone dressing up and having a wild time. There are parades, freaks, bands .... You name it. Thousands of people go every year. I'll probably be there again this year.
Last year I went down to enjoy the party (alone, since my friend had backed out at the last moment). I had a couple beers, and went walking around, seeing the sights and having fun. (I was dressed as an army guy, so no face disguise was involved.) I spent a good amount of time watching for people - not just women - who might be cool to hang out with.
I went to a dive bar to grab a drink and some food, and I spotted a couple of women dressed in some rather lame costumes, but they looked like they might be fun. They seemed less "bimbo" and more intelligent and challenging. I walked over and said hello and said I was going to be their host for the evening. They pulled me right into their conversation, and as it turns out they were in from the East coast to come to the party. I decided I liked one of these gals enough to see what we could do.
Now, to make a long story short, through the use of fun conversation, NOT zoning in on her with freakish attention, and constantly changing our locations as much as possible, I was tongue-tied with her within the hour and she kept grabbing my ass. The rest I'll leave to the imagination.
BTW, The tactic I mentioned above of changing locations as much as possible is a way of simulating multiple dates with the same woman. Your rapport with a woman increases exponentially with the number of locations you go with her, so why not do more in the same night? This is how you get the effect of 2 or 3 dates in one night.
Now, my internal process is simply this:
1) I use my own personalized mental preparations. I no longer stand in front of a mirror and chant "You are special!" the way some self-help guys would have you. After enough time of reinforcing your belief system, it only takes a quick recollection of a past success to put your mood and beliefs in the frame of a lady killer. Anchoring is an NLP method that I've modified to fit my own mental makeup.
2) I EMOTIONALLY believe that being ALONE is a worthy alternative. That will allow you to pull the plug at your own discretion and not feel as if you were the loser in any interaction. I have a mantra that goes, "I'm better off alone than with the wrong woman." I'm super comfortable being alone and in silence. (i.e., no television or music on to distract me from my own thoughts.) This way there's no pain of loss to avoid.
3) I'm RELAXED. Most guys don't truly understand the necessity of shedding their nervous excitement around women. Sure, in some cases it can be flattering to the woman you're talking with and it can energize you, but it also communicates all the wrong things about you. I've learned how to stay relaxed and comfortable in the most trying situations with women. Even if I'm crashing and burning HORRIBLY, I still can smile inside with the knowledge that it's never the end of the world. NEVER.
4) I KNOW MYSELF. I'm totally aware of my own defense mechanisms, and what triggers them. By knowing how I'll react in situations and being aware of them, I can then avoid any panic or nervousness. I took the time to build my self-discipline and self-awareness to a level where I no longer use the excuse "I just couldn't help myself!" (Which is a common excuse among guys who can't be bothered with introspection and building their self-control.)
5) I take TOTAL responsibility for any success or failure, and I'm aware of which situations are not under my control. Knowing what is in your sphere of influence versus your sphere of control is crucial if you're going to be happy in life and manage your stress levels effectively.
Every guy out there needs to spend a little time figuring out his own mechanisms and what drives him. Do not - I repeat, DO NOT - get into the game of therapy or over-analysis, or any number of today's touchy-feely, be-in-therapy-forever solutions, but become adept at figuring out why you did what you did - WITHOUT JUDGMENT. The closer you get to this ideal, the stronger your game will improve.
5) I take TOTAL responsibility for any success or failure, and I'm aware of which situations are not under my control. Knowing what is in your sphere of influence versus your sphere of control is crucial if you're going to be happy in life and manage your stress levels effectively.
6) A few misses with women does not equate to total failure. In other words, I don't have to win them ALL. This need for men to never screw up is another kind of insecurity. It's as if they fall apart if just one woman didn't seem to approve of them, or they were unable to get her number.
7) Constant interaction and exposure to women. This is one thing that keeps you in the game, even when your game isn't going the way you'd like. Just don't become reliant on women for friendships. Then you slip back into that nice-guy trap.
8) Seek qualified external feedback. If you have a friend with GOOD judgment (and that's tough to come by) you need to latch on to that and use it for all it's worth.
This then leads to a VERY simple plan of action to take my internal game EXTERNAL:
1) I target the kind of woman I'm interested in. Usually attractive (7+) and intelligent. I can't stand dumb chicks, unless sex is the only goal. The woman I want is a factor of my own taste, of course, but she's gotta have a brain. And a nice body - hey, I'm not kidding myself. B-cup boobies and an ass that won't quit is a ticket to happiness in my corner of the universe.
2) I approach. I don't hesitate for a second, because that's when that voice starts up in your head to discourage you. Just walk over and find the words. Fail sooner to get to success.
3) I develop some rapport. I'm friendly, but I put a little dose or two of humor, teasing, and maybe a little C&F. (Beware the use of Cocky and Funny as a cure-all. Once again, it's an over-used and frequently misunderstood part of seduction.)
4) I close for a phone number, email, or next step. A next step can be an immediate drink, coffee date, whatever, given the current circumstances.
5) I review what did or did not work in each of these encounters, modifying my approach, and staying RELAXED. This is the habit of sharpening your saw (for those of you familiar with Stephen Covey.)
Now, one thing I do that many other seduction coaches typically don't is that I try to use the latest methods to meet women. Guys don't yet know how to effectively mine the Internet or Speed Dating for so many good encounters. 95% of the guys at these things are AFCs, which makes it so much easier for practicing your game. It's a great conversation simulator, too, allowing you to really break yourself out of the fear of talking to women. After you go through 4 or 5 women in an hour (sometimes many more) you find your rhythm and groove with them. I always coach guys to try new and different methods.
Sarging at clubs and on the street is intimidating to some guys, and the budding seducer needs an "entry-level" method of meeting women that allows his confidence to build.
I believe in using as many different methods to meet women as you can. Bars, parties, friends, speed dating, personals, Internet, cold walkups, you name it. I call these multiple streams of dating income. If you work 3 or 4 of them to a decent level of aptitude, you'll be a rock star. Your confidence will skyrocket. It's guaranteed, but so few men actually work it. They'll try once or twice, come up with an excuse to not try again, and think they've got it all figured out. The ones who get laid don't stop. They're relentless. (Without being stalkers.)
Clifford: How do you motivate yourself and do what you need to do? When guys are starting out to learn to improve what they are doing with women, most inevitably come up against a learning curve which results in a lot of failures and frustrations. The motivation to continue sometimes is hard to come by - what suggestions do you have about this? Further, when guys get somewhat successful, they often also come up against plateaus or sticking points that seem insurmountable - what advice can you give to the more advanced guys to break through these more difficult barriers?
Carlos: A lot of guys make the same common mistakes with women. Most of the time, these mistakes are simply an extension of their own insecurities.
For example, I was talking with a gal I met on-line the other night, and she said what we already knew, which was that women can pick up on a man's insecurities in a MICROSECOND. This girl could read them in the profiles that guys put up on-line. Sure, they realize fully that they have their own shortfalls, but that's WHY THEY NEED MEN. I'm not some caveman here, but the reality is that there are very DEFINITE gender roles in our world, and men are neglecting them. One of the primary things men provide for women is STABILITY and direction. And THAT is why our confidence is essential. We have to be confident enough for TWO people.
So here are some of the inhibitors from climbing that learning curve you mentioned:
1) Inadequate relaxation. Guys have to learn how to calm down and take things easy. They're way too uptight about immediate gratification. Their interactions are completely shadowed by the "please approve of me" need. Even players can come across with this, and it's obvious to the more intelligent women out there.
2) Too much anger. Most guys are pent up with every kind of emotional constipation you can imagine. They're pissed because women control the sex. They're pissed because they can't "understand women." They're just plain pissed off about a lot of things. But we've been told that we must be "in touch" with our anger.
I propose that you use your anger as FUEL. Men need anger, but we need to use it constructively. Anger is the 104+ octane in your car that propels you to your goals. It's the red-hot chili pepper jammed in your sphincter to get your ass in gear. Your powerful emotions are your motivation when all else seems hopeless.
3) OBSESSION. Guys (especially "nice" guys) tend to become too easily focused on just ONE woman. This happens with 90% of all the guys I counsel, and it's the most easy to overcome. You see, guys have been brought up with this mistaken belief in dating just ONE woman. (Let me tell you that a woman is nowhere near as monogamous as she'd have you believe.) The worst thing you can do is to focus all your attention on one conquest. To paraphrase Princess Leia from Star Wars, "The tighter your grip, the more women will slip through your fingers."
Even advanced players get too obsessed sometimes with a particular result or image. You have to be flexible. Seduction is a highly fluid situation.
4) Loss of FAITH. I'm not talking about spiritual or religious faith here, but I'm sure it could be just as applicable. You have to have an overriding belief that EVERYTHING WILL WORK OUT RIGHT. If you have this, nothing can stop you. But most guys give up their belief too soon and lose hope. Realize that all the best guys have plateaus and even dips in their game. It's inevitable. To quote from a great line on the Sopranos: "There will always be both good times and bad times in life, and all a man can do is try to find his pleasures along the way."
5) Giving in to habits instead of holding to a higher standard. If there's one thing I hear too much of it's this lame-ass excuse: "I just HAD to call her right away", or "I couldn't help myself." Bullshit. You're just failing to take responsibility for your NOT doing what you know you need to do. Poor self-discipline. Most guys SAY they want something, but they're not really willing to pay the price to get it.
6) Breaking through barriers is almost always about developing a new ABILITY. That's it. When you come up against a situation that challenges you, that's the message. You need to develop a new skill. You have to be livened by the challenge. Don't get all depressed and angry. Let the challenge fire you up to a new level of achievement. This is the stuff that MEN are about, after all. Overcoming and conquering. This is something that women don't really experience the way we men do.
I developed a few basic methods to overcome these hurdles. Now, these are my personal internal methods and beliefs, and you have to cultivate your own. But they're basic, and anyone can adopt them. They start with the internal processes I talked about above, translating into a game plan of action, both externally as well as within my head.
For example, it's very important to apply the correct EMOTIONAL meaning to any circumstance. Recently I've been doing a lot of "research" with on-line dating. One of the things I've noticed is that the women who post profiles are overly cautious, as well as flooded with attention. It's a seller's (i.e., women's) market there, and guys have to work fairly hard to get noticed in the right way. Chicks just peek out at the guys from behind their safe little keyboards, so you have to know how to draw them out of their insecurities and fears. And be able to do that in email. (I'm a pretty good writer, so I've been fortunate enough to come up with many methods for this.)
I've had a few email "conversations" evaporate when the women just appears to flake and disappear. This is, of course, inevitable. It says nothing of my ability or skill with women. Here's how I reframe the experience:
"I know she's getting a million emails a day. Chances are she just answered someone at random, and it's likely that she'll find that guy is a dweeb. If she hasn't hooked up with a dweeb, she's probably just playing with the fire.
"I don't play with fire - I TAME it.
"If she didn't pick up on my Alpha status, that also means that she's probably a beta chick.
"She's also likely to NOT be a woman I'm all that interested in, so she just helped me by sorting herself out early.
"NEXT."
I just bypass that mental hangup that a lot of guys develop about "the one that got away." For some reason, we want to convert the ones that resist us the most. Men are very motivated by challenge, just as much as women. I see this even in players.
And the one thing most guys don't realize about reframing (or re-defining) an experience is that they must really BELIEVE in what they change the meaning into. It does no good to go through an experience, such as not getting a woman's number, say to yourself "It's okay, it doesn't matter," but you still have that sinking, disappointed feeling inside that just eats at you. This is where most guys fail to take their game forward. Lack of emotional intelligence.
You have to defeat the EMOTIONS of your unhealthy interpretation. It's not enough to WANT it to mean something different. You see, emotions add the charge to your thoughts, and THAT is what conditions you.
Men don't understand their own emotions enough to condition themselves correctly. Men AVOID the negative feelings, while women want to feel ALL the emotions (negative and positive), but they tend to get addicted to the ride, not the desired outcomes.
This is where I propose that all Alpha Men out there must work to raise their emotional intelligence as high as possible. It's the most critical skill for a man who wants to make lasting, positive change in his life.
Clifford: Thanks Carlos, for taking the time to explain your ideas and experiences for the guys. Perhaps you can take a minute and mention a product or two of yours that you think would be very valuable for the readers here to get.
Carlos: I appreciate the time and opportunity to share the information, Cliff. I know there are a lot of guys out there hungry for information on seduction.
I have three packages available right now. Datingdynamics.com offers an e-book package for the guys interested in more of the complete "dating" game. Seductionmethod.com is a program aimed strictly at seduction and getting laid. And my latest program, Alphaseduction.com completely covers developing your inner game and confidence with women, with a 6 CD set to guide you through. I also offer a regular monthly audio coaching that has been going strong for over a year now and a newsletter at each site.
Best of luck to all the guys out there.
PROMOS & REVIEWS SECTION (there are NO paid ads in this list and never have been. The "commercial" section is distinguished by the "--------------" separators):
DAVID NEWS:
The Seminar in Toronto is really moving strong. We are starting to promote the seminar as well as the party and have already lined up a great number of interested, very attractive women. The party will be held the Saturday night of the Seminar and we are working hard on making this the event of the year.
Many other new things are happening at Be Relentless - we are working on a special project which will be totally unique as well as a new audio tape set.
The tapes of the first David Seminar are now available and are being shipped upon receipt of your order, but please allow 4-6 weeks for delivery. You can visit the website at www.be-relentless.com and orders should be made through paypal (go to www.paypal.com and send money to sales@be-relentless.com) if you need some other way to make payment, inquire at info@be-relentless.com. This product comes on two DVD discs for a total of approximately 6 1/2 hours of playing time. The price is $230 USD + $20 USD for the DVD which covers shipping and handling anywhere in the world. Inquire about shipping by overnight courier. These tapes are now available in a sound only version also.
Private in person or telephone consultations with David are available. David is particularly intuitive with regard to your specific individual problems with certain women. You can get on the phone, answer his questions on the situation, and he will give you very insightful advice on how to succeed in your particular mission.
PLEASE NOTE: This David is not to be confused with David DeAngelo of www.doubleyourdating.com (who has posted some great stuff here under the name "Sisonpyh"), or David Shade (of www.davidshade.com).
Blake Richards has put out a new ebook that looks very interesting. Check it out here: www.social-mastery.com/Game.html
Real Social Dynamics WORKSHOPS:
I highly recommend that you check these guys out. They are in the final stages of producing their long-awaited e-book as well as a redesign of their website.
Anyone interested in attending their seminars and/or workshops, email Papa at papa@realsocialdynamics.com with the subject "WORKSHOP" and mention that you heard about it from Cliff's List. Also note: RSD will consider working out payment plans to make their workshop affordable - mention this to them.
Real Social Dynamics (www.realsocialdynamics.com/ ):
Learn what works in seminar, and then jump directly into the field and watch the instructors demonstrate and teach it live. Stop feeling the fear of not knowing what to do ...
Classroom Seminars
December 3-4, 2004 San Francisco, USA
In-Field Workshops
December 2-4, 2004 San Francisco, USA
Individualized Bootcamps
Here is the latest RSD Schedule (sign up and get more info here: www.realsocialdynamics.com/):
Bootcamp - Los Angeles
December 3-5, 2004 SOLD OUT
December 10-12, 2004
December 17-19, 2004
January 7-9, 2005
January 14-16, 2005
January 21-23, 2005
January 28-30, 2005
February 4-6, 2005
Bootcamp - New York
December 3-5, 2004
December 10-12, 2004
December 17-19, 2004
Bootcamp - San Francisco
December 10-12, 2004
December 17-19, 2004
January 7-9, 2005
January 14-16, 2005
January 21-23, 2005
January 28-30, 2005
February 4-6, 2005
February 11-13, 2005
February 18-20, 2005
Bootcamp - Special Event
Jan. 28-30, 2005 (Las Vegas)
July 8-10, 2005 (Montreal)
Go to www.realsocialdynamics.com/ to signup for these events on their schedule.
New Dating/Seduction Seminars & Workshop in Montreal by DOC!
Doc, who many of you know from his great interview here last time and all too rare but outstanding posts on this list, on Mystery's Lounge, and the Montreal Lair, is bringing his seminars and speed dating events to Montreal. Previously they were mainly held in Toronto as part of the Learning Annex, Doc is now setting it up here and plans to hold events on a monthly basis.
The website is www.set nalife.com. Registrations available on the website. The events are Dating Secrets for Women, a 3 Hour seminar (cost $50) and Dating Secrets for Guys; a Guide to The Art of Dating (also 3 hours and $50). There will also be a speed dating event in the evening for $50. You can contact Doc by email at seduction.school@sympatico.ca.
The fall calendar has a full weekend seminar and makeover. He also has 3 new books coming out this fall under the SETNA Dating Manual Series. Volume I (to be released this week) deals with the psychology of attraction, first impressions, and working on your inner game, Volume II (coming in September) deals with tactics and strategies to go from meeting her to dating her, and Volume III will deal with Managing Relationships.
Full-weekend Dating Makeover workshops will be offered soon (including a half day with a personal stylist, video tape analysis of body language, and live practice sessions with dating coaches beautiful women who will give the guys on the spot feedback on how they come across and what to improve). If there is a group of 10 or more guys interested in a seminar (or 5 guys for a workshop, he would consider making a special trip to their city).
This is a great opportunity to learn from a real master.
Mystery Method Workshops:
What method are YOU using?
If you are opening groups (or sets: 2-sets, 3-sets, mixed sets, etc) of people with the 3 second rule by stacking indirect openers (including false opinion openers), false time constraining (discovered by Style), demonstrating a higher value to your romantic interest’s peer group with high octane DHVs while she obliquely observes (locking her into her own set with a prop), and simultaneously performing false disqualifiers (which include negs) on her with the intension of disarming her peergroup and then isolating her to rebuild her self-esteem once you have enough IOIs (indicators of interest) so you may share in a comfort and trust building effort and then build in a jealousy subplot to solidify her attraction for you, you are using The Mystery Method.
If instead you are only approaching women who are alone, you are greatly limiting your options and quite likely alienating your target's friends. Do you want a lonely woman (why is she lonely?) or a woman who already has a healthy social lfe? Truth is, healthy women have healthy relationships ... sometimes good friendships with guys. Like it or not, you will have to meet these women with men in her group.
Women of beauty are rarely found alone. Don't miss the opportunity to meet and attract them WITH social proof from her very own peergroup. Group Approach Theory (GAT - created by me) improves your options and increases the chances for attraction DRAMATICALLY over Single Approach Theory (SAT).
The guys who are GREAT in this game KNOW that they can improve their game ten-fold through seminars and personal coaching in-field workshops. Think about this: Why did so many of the greats who use my GAT (Style, Tyler D., MTL_PUA, and others) take my seminars and workshops? What started them off to greatness in this game? Can you see the co-relation may in fact be a causation?
If you have NEVER taken a seminar or workshop before, it's time to finally reconsider. They are life-transforming. I have conducted dozens of them. I am currently conducting a bootcamp and will accept only 5 people. Workshops and seminars were for many of the greats THE difference between great success and failure. If you are ready, give me a call and sign up. If you have any questions, give me a shout at 323-219-8696 (Mystery) because email sucks, or visit www.Mysterymethod.com and email me your #. We need to talk. Man to man.
Dates of upcoming Events:
November 25-29 Individual Programs Seminar space only
December 3-5 Chicago Seminar space only
December 10-12 Chicago Seminar space only
December 17-19 Denver
December 28-30 Los Angeles
January 7-9 Las Vegas Seminar space only
January 14-16 Dallas
February 28-30 San Francisco
Swinggcat has published a new ebook which you can check out at his website at www.realworldseduction.com. Those of you who remember his outstanding posts here will be anxious to get this as soon as possible. Highly recommended.
Ross Jeffries Speed Seduction Seminars (www.speedseduction.net/)
Advanced Speed Seduction® Seminars - All Seminars Updated!
Schedule 2005
Location Dates
Los Angeles, CA January 22, 23, 24
Chicago, IL April 22, 23, 24
New York, NY May 27, 28, 29
London, England September 2, 3, 4
Speed Life Seminars
Schedule 2005
Location Dates
Puerto Vallarta, Mexico (Location - Tenative) November 6 thru 12 Sign Up Online!
Magick / Psychic Influence Seminars
Schedule 2005
Location Dates
Los Angeles, CA March 18, 19, 20
Major Mark (www.trucor.com) has finished his schedule for 2004.
Send mail to Cassi@trucor.com with questions or comments about his seminars.
Call to register: 419 882-8543 or go to www.trucor.com
Double Your Dating LIVE! NEW Seminar! We will be reviewing all of the new DYD products here soon, including the monthly interview series in which David DeAngelo interviews "Dating Gurus".
Las Vegas the last weekend of January, 2005.
You can order all your DYD products and register for seminars through this link: www.doubleyourdating.com/cl
www.davidshade.com SEMINAR
What would it be like to have everything you've ever wanted sexually with the women in your life?
The Advanced Sexual and Psychological Techniques to Drive Your Woman Wild
* Learn the aspects of bringing out the ruthlessly expressive sexual creature in your woman.
* Discover how to bring out her deepest desires, and even desires she never knew about.
* Learn the ways to mentally stimulate her to make her wildly crazy about you.
* Find out how to excite and fulfill her beyond her wildest dreams.
* Know that you can create and enjoy a relationship with a woman who is completely loyal and responsive to you.
This seminar will demonstrate to you what it means to be the personally and sensually powerful man that sexual women are longing to be with.
One of the greatest benefits of attending this seminar is that you will discover how to find a high quality woman and keep her screaming for more.
Presented by David Shade, the author of David Shade's Manual.
NEW PRODUCTS FROM DAVE RIKER
Have you ever wished that Speed Seduction® was taught in a more structured way, piece by piece, subject by subject, in a way that allows you to really
understand it, really KNOW it and really USE and APPLY it even better than before?
If so, check out www.daveriker.com/ssmanual/
Riker's Seduction Log - Live Seminar
If you always wanted to hear more field reports, with full details, and even some recordings, then this seminar is for you. Dave Riker (Ross's co-trainer for those of you who don't know him) spends about 3 hours each evening going through his personal Logs and notes and provides full reports on Sarges, many from start to close (finish). And that's a full "close" by the way, not just an email address or phone number!
The seminar is held in conjunction with Ross Jeffries Speed Seduction Seminars. Ross's seminar is during the day (and Riker presents at that too) and then Riker does his seminar in the evening. And even if you do not attend Ross's seminar you can still attend Riker's.
For full details see the web page at: http://www.daveriker.com/logseminar/track/cl.htm (site is either inactive or no longer relevant)
Be sure to check out his "Reviews" page on his site. Many guys that have been in the game for a while, and attended a LOT of seminars, were just blown away by Riker's Log seminar.
Introducing 1 on 1 Badboy workshops:
Badboy is a Croatian PUA from Zagreb who has spent almost 4 years in the game. He is also a respected poster in Mystery's lounge.
To see some of his stuff, search for posts by "croBadboy" on mASF or read one of the recent issues of Cliff's list.
Workshops are 1 on 1 for 3 days.
Each day consists of a 4-hour seminar and 5 hours of active in-field work. Each night you will make 20-30 approaches with your teacher to get field experience. 1 on 1 training makes it possible to answer any questions you might have and cover the most important aspects of the game in detail. Teachings are tailored to your level in the game.
The basic structure of the workshop is:
Day 1:
Social intelligence/emotional intelligence
How to dress, peacocking vs. dressing style
Alpha-male bodylanguage secrets
Attitude (inner-game) and getting a good seductive voice
Difference between emotional and party type girls
Social dynamics in clubs (2sets/3sets/lonewolves), know your city
Openers (sets with males vs. only-girl sets)
Day 2:
Difference between PUing alone and with a wing
Different tools for getting attraction
Power of contrast (bad boy & nice guy in one)
Stealing their frames
Passing shit tests
Push-pull
Isolation tactics(2steps)
Day 3:
AMOG tactics (the AMOG handshake, group set AMOG destroyers)
Boyfriend destroyers
Passing LMR
Secrets of good sex
How to manage a good relationship
More bodylanguage secrets
How to turn Coffee dates into fuck-fest in just 1 hour
How to turn a 0$ date into a time she will never forget
Difference between PUing in different places (small towns, big cities, colleges and the difference between certain clubs and the girls who go there)
Badboy says he can write a pages of what he does with guys because it's not just PU. He opens their EYES to LIFE, to understand how to live successfully.
For more info, email Badboy at badboy@playboylifestyle.net. See Badboy's new website: www.badboylifestyle.com
UK (Europe) - December 9-10-11 - $850.00 (SOLD OUT)
Individualized Workshop (1on1) Zagreb (Croatia) - December 16-17-18 - $1499.99 Instuctors: Cortez, Badboy
London, UK - January 6--7-8 (2005) - $999.95 (SOLD OUT) Instructors: Shark, Badboy
Individualized Workshop (1on1) Zagreb (Croatia) - January 20-21-22 - $1499.99 Instuctors : Badboy, Cortez, Shark
Cancun, Mexico - March 10-11-12 (2005) - $995.95
Cancun, Mexico - March 24-25-26 (2005) - $995.95
Cancun, Mexico - March /April 31 - 1-2 (2005) - $995.95
Amsterdam - April 21-22-23 (2005) - $995.95 Instructors: Shark, Badboy
You can make a deposit ($200) for a workshop on Paypal and send money to: nightlife@playboylifestyle.net
Thundercat's New "Seduction Lair"
Get the latest News, Rumors, Tips, Tricks, & Analysis on the Pick-Up and Seduction community! The site is updated daily with lots of free and exclusive content.
Also a good way to keep up with things without having to navigate mASF. Drop By TSL today! www.seductionlair.com/
The Art of Approaching: Learn to meet ANY woman, ANY time, ANY where. The most difficult hurdle for most men to overcome is that of the initial Approach. This comprehensive eBook gives you over 35 unique Openers, as well as a step-by-step roadmap to help overcome your fear of approaching forever!
Pick-Up 101
Taught at the Project San Francisco Mansion by Sensei and Wilder. Classes are a combination of lecture and tons of personal attention with supervised fieldwork in the evenings. The Fundamentals are hammered home: Opening, Generating Attraction, Isolation and Bridging. We work with each student to highlight their strengths and create a congruent image and identity. We also work with students to make their _own_ structured openers and attraction stories. Finally, we bring in live girls for the guys to practice on and we video tape and critique these sessions. There is no faster way to get up to speed on the fundamentals of pick-up than this workshop. And any PUA who has truly mastered the fundamentals is already in the top 5% of guys out there doing this stuff. Pricing, workshop schedules and student testimonials available at our website, www.pickup101.com
Here's the updated and upcoming Pick-Up 101 Workshop info:
Fist, we're instituting a referral program for our workshops. Anyone you refer from outside the community who signs up for our fundamentals workshop, now called The Art of Attraction, we'll pay you $50 cash or $100 credit toward future workshops (stay tuned for massive results from our Study Groups.)
Upcoming events:
Dec. 17-19: December Art of Attraction (Fundamentals) Workshop, San Francisco
Jan. 14-16: Art of Attraction Workhp in Sydney, Australia
Jan. 21-23: Art of Attraction Workhp in Sydney, Australia
*** And a new one!
Free Orientation Workshop...
This is a 2 hour free workshop where we introduce people to what we do. It a great place to come meet the instructors, see the Project San Francisco Mansion and check out upcoming classes. Everyone has friends that aren't in the community, and it gets to be a pain winging with them because they don't know anything. This is the place to bring them. It's free, and it'll get them excited about the community and you'll get your wing back! This is a great opportunity to get referral fees, just bring them here to the free seminar and we'll do the rest!
Game on
Juggler is back!
See the sharp revised website at www.jugglermethod.com/.
Juggler Method will be hosting Seminars and Workshops in English-speaking countries worldwide over the course of 2005. Timing is usually as follows:
- Fri-Sat: Weekend Workshop
- Sun: Seminar
- Mon-Tues: Weekday Workshop
1st Half 2005 Schedule (subject to change)
Dates Events Notes
Los Angeles: Dec 8-13 Workshops Dec 10-13 full, 8-9 added
San Francisco: Dec 17-21 Seminar and Workshops Seminar date: Dec 19
Dec 20-21 workshop full
San Diego: Dec 27-31 Workshops
London, England: Jan 7-16 Seminars and Workshops Seminar Date: Jan 9
New York: Jan 22 Seminar
Miami: Jan 28-Feb 1 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: Jan 30
Sydney, Aus: Feb 16-20 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: Feb 20
Austin: March 11-15 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: March 13
Washington, DC: March 25-29 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: March 27
Chicago: April 8-12 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: April 10
Toronto: April 22-26 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: April 24
London, England: May 6-15 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: May 8
San Francisco: May 20-24 Seminar and Workshops Seminar Date: May 22
Please email info@jugglermethod.com to reserve your spot today - both events are filling up quickly. If possible, please indicate the city of interest and either "Workshop" or "Seminar" in the subject line of the email.
Sanek has a new website up at fybb.eluid.org
Check it out and see his comments.
Check out the 'supermarket of seduction' at www.seductionpro.com. Lots of interesting products to look into.
Impact Interaction (www.impactinteraction.com) @ London
Angel Caido, RyobI and Lockstock have been running Workshops and Seminars in London since the beginning of the year. The workshops are small in size (trainer : student ratio of 2:1 as max), so students get personal attention on sticking points.
The workshops include:
- Basejump: For approach newbies who need to get internal game and basic attraction skills in gear
- Field Interaction: To perfect your bar/ club and street performance
- Solid Game: Everything good except lots of flakes? Few end results? End to end game sticking points covered…
For more information go to www.impactinteraction.com or contact them @ contact@impactinteraction.com.
Flirting Weekend London - 4/5 December 2004
Learn how to develop immense pulling power in every aspect of your life!
"Flirting isn't just about impressing the opposite sex and picking up a partner, it's about getting on with people", says Peta Heskell, the founder of Britain's only Flirting Academy. "Great flirts do it with everyone -flirt that is!" Flirting is a way of interacting with people that makes it fun and easy to connect with them and makes them want to be with you. Become super sexy, develop your conversation power, boost your confidence, courage and self esteem and find out how to approach strangers and feel good. You may be looking for love, want to make more friends or improve the way you interact with people in general.
Flirt with life. Flirt for love. Flirt for fun. Flirt for success.
For more information about the October Flirting Weekend in Bristol, contact
LifeTalks - tel. 0117 973 1010, email info@lifetalks.co.uk or visit www.lifetalks.co.uk
For more information about the December Flirting Weekend in London and other workshops with Peta, contact The Attraction Academy tel. 0700 4 354 784 or
visit www.attractionacademy.com/
Have you ever asked yourself...
* What does it take to make a woman feel totally comfortable making out with me - even if she barely knows me?
* How do I get women to WANT to sleep with me? After all, what good are all those "bedroom techniques" I learned if I don't even know how to get her back to my bedroom in the first place?
* Why do women melt around some guys, but they are totally unresponsive to me? What do they have that I don't?
Wouldn't it be nice if you knew a guaranteed way to "get physical" with any woman you go out with? Have you ever been on a date with a woman, and wondered *how* you can start "making out" with her? (by making out, I mean kissing, hugging, holding hands, etc.)
Jason King has just released a not new report that will teach you everything you need to know about getting *close* to a woman on a date.
Jason is an absolute master at making out with a woman on the first date. Whenever he goes out with a woman, he seems to put them under some kind of "love spell", and they want to make out with him more and more as the date progresses. By the end of the date, the women usually invent all kinds of excuses to invite him back to their place.
There is NO other person out there who is teaching these skills. If you've ever wanted to learn how to make out with a woman on the FIRST date... not weeks or months later... you MUST check out his site.
Step by Step Threesomes
Hey, check out Suzy Bauer's site and her e-book (we need a review, so someone get this and let us know what you think) about creating threesomes. Suzy is an attractive married bi-sexual woman who says that her e-book will show you what to do to create threesomes, how to overcome resistance and how no one can tell you how to do this better than a woman. www.stepbystepthreesome.com/
"Seduction Tips-Seduce the woman for you today"
www.pmmarketing.org/seductiontips.htm
Maximillian Hell:
I have a PU journal up on livejournal. Right now it's mostly just a record of my sarges--but comments are welcome.
www.livejournal.com/users/maximillianhell
Visit these sites (and give me your comments on their products):
http://www.sexualrapportmodeling.com/jump.php?a=2350 (site is either inactive or no longer relevant)
Gunwitch has also entered the commercial game. Go to: www.dynamicsexlife.com/
Someone needs to check this site and its products out also: www.mensniche.com (site is either inactive or no longer relevant)
Daniel:
If you are looking for a wing and you are a guy from Romania, you can check on our forums at www.seductierapida.ro/forum and you might find one.
Carlos Xuma:
Time is running short for all of us, no matter how young or old you are. Don't waste precious years learning by trial and error (and most likely not at all). Get the information on how to improve your dating life TODAY. Make the changes you need to make to get the love, sex, and relationships that you want and DESERVE to have. Download THE DATING BLACK BOOK right now at: www.datingdynamics.com/ebookstore.htm
() (@.com ):
has a system and set of Tarot Cards that he his going to be launching soon. Find out more at his website.
P.S. Try magic words 'ben' 'rap' and 'nlp'.
A few sites to check out:
Mike PilinskI is the author of "Without Embarrassment: The Social Coward's Totally Fearless Seduction System"... a unique method of meeting girls that will have you making up for wasted time spent living in shy-guy hell from the very first moment you test it out. Check it Out Here => www.highstatusmale.com/.
David Wygant (www.whatsyourexcuse.com & www.mydatingagent.com).
Check out Payton Kane www.seduceandconquer.com. VERY interesting. There will be a review of his product here shortly.
Erick Kand has a new website that showcases Hypnosis Stage Shows for fun and entertainment: www.HypnosisEvents.com
The Foundations of Seduction
Hi, you know something? When it comes to seductionhey, when it comes to ANYTHING--how you feel has a huge impact on the results you get. But the way you feel doesn’t have to be determined by your surroundings, your expectations, others’ behavior, or the tides and stars. You can guide your own feelings. By doing so, you can adjust and enhance your results. You can replace frustration with the satisfaction of tangy, blood-red, salty-sweet resolve. When you can change the way you feel, you can change what you experience… and what you encounter… and then the world stands revealed as something you yourself partially create. Sometimes, to begin claiming the victories you deserve, all you need is a simple little tool: a way of channeling your own emotions. A way of tapping your inner fire. A way of taking that inner fire, and letting it melt your external obstacles. A way of changing all that you feel, about all that you experience. Of course, you may not need or want such a tool. For some, the ability to guide and
drive one’s own emotional experience is pretty basic stuff. Some people shrug off rejection, feel wonderful almost all the time, and easily attain their goals. If that’s true for you, and you don’t think you can add to your abilitywell, you may be right. In that case, my new CD may not be for you. On the other hand, should you want a tool meant to ease the transition to seductive success… to productive success… to any kind of success, maybe this new CD can be of use to you. It’s called "Foundations of Seduction". You can get it for $29.97 plus $5 Priority Mail s/h, by going here: www.sexualkey.com/ Just enter "$34.97" into the FlexPay box and then email me at info@sexualkey.com with your shipping address and a note that you’ve ordered "Foundations of Seduction". If you’re outside the U.S., please add an additional $5 for shipping. Have fun! JD www.sexualkey.com/
LOUIS AND COPELAND'S "FREEDOM WITH WOMEN" SEMINAR DATES
Ron Louis and David Copeland have been doing several boot camp style one-on-one courses and have a seminar coming up November 12-14.
To find out more about the "Freedom with Women" seminar, go to www.howtosucceedwithwomen.com/workshops/fww5.html
or contact davidc@howtosucceedwithwomen.com
HOW TO SUCCEED WITH WOMEN Ron Louis and David Copeland have their Mastery Program Tape series available. It has some very good stuff on it and that, in combination with other pieces that you can pick up here and from the other products mentioned can be a help. For those who are just starting out learning how to deal with women, this is an excellent basic daily course to take you through the process of dealing with women. For those who are more advanced, you should pick up a few good ideas from this set of tapes. howtosucceedwithwomen.com/
1. You can receive a series of audio programs from the "Freedom With Women" seminar. This audio is not available anywhere else!
2. You'll get valuable email summations of these audio programs to "lock in" the learning and help you take action.
3. You'l get other special email lessons from the "Freedom with Women" seminar, all about finally having real freedom with the women you desire.
To get the free course, go to
www.howtosucceedwithwomen.com/workshops/free-audio.html
Advanced Macking:
In case you want a step by step guide on how to get into one-night stands, check out Anthony Berger's Advanced Macking manual. What makes it unique is that it is engineered towards making it happen the same night you meet them. To learn how to persuade women back to your pad, check out his site: www.advancedmacking.com/Discount.htm
Michael:
If you want to improve both your pick up game and your understanding of women on a deeper level, you've got to come out to my Dating Wizard Live Seminars in Toronto. It is two FULL days of non-stop IMMERSION - including a live pick-up component - giving you a whopping,eye-opening insight into how to be successful with women on a whole new level.
There are also awesome guest speakers at these seminar:
To learn more about this special seminar, go to:
And follow the "Seminars" link.
And if you haven't downloaded my eBook, "The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women", then that's the place to get started.
Inside, I explain step-by-step how to approach women, how to get instant dates, how to get physical, and how to sustain her interest if you desire a relationship. Best of all, you won't have to be a jerk to OUTDO the jerks!
Download it now at:
And follow the link to "About The Dating Wizard"
FREE HYPNOSIS MINI-TUTORIAL
The UltimateSeduction Yahoo group, at groups.yahoo.com/group/UltimateSeduction/ is sponsoring a free one-month mini-tutorial on Conversational Hypnosis. This tutorial, presented by the hypnotist Archangel, is sectioned off into five parts:
1. Trance Words
2. Rapport
3. Persuasion Anchoring
4. Pacing, &
5. Leading
Although less than halfway through, members are reporting some highly entertaining, and some startling, success stories. The UltimateSeduction group has the advantage of having more than a few women on-list, enabling members to get some very pointed straight talk on their techniques. There is nothing to memorize - only a handful of very simple, and very effective, techniques. The group is gaining about 200 new members a week and is lightly moderated.
Anyone may join the tutorial at: groups.yahoo.com/group/UltimateSeduction/
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