There was heavy dose of intrigue built in along the way

The October 2002 issue of Playboy has a pretty interesting article. The following excerpt is offered freely at www.playboy.com so I am assuming they won't mind my running it here:

How to Talk a Woman into Sex

The only guide to seduction you'll ever need by Dean Kuipers

A bartender friend says he sees it night after night: A great-looking woman meets some guy -- not Benicio del Toro, not a stand-up comic, not even an heir to a beverage empire -- and something he says convinces her that it's time to screw. Sometimes they make it only to the car before they are overcome with lust, and then they're back in the bar, looking obvious and thirsty. But each time the drama is tender and irresistible and follows a certain arc along which the guy, and always the guy, has about a hundred opportunities to fuck up.

Will he get a shot at life-affirming intimacy, no matter how anonymous or brief? Or will she suddenly realize she'd rather be home getting stoned and watching Wuthering Heights with a battery-powered Johnny Wadd stuffed in her pajamas? It all depends on how well he reads the signs.

There is a golden rule to getting first-night nooky and, as with a tea ceremony or putting the pin back in a hand grenade, it's so simple it's hard: She has to feel understood, even if all you understand is, "I want to fuck you, and don't make a big deal out of it." She wants to know she's safe to express herself. That you are committed to the process of talking her through it. That you'll protect her from her own excuses by making all the moves. That you want her. That she's worth it. That she's the white-hot center of the universe.

It helps to pay attention to the wisdom of George Clinton: Free the mind and the ass will follow. Every clown in the room wants her body. But if you acknowledge her sexy mind, brother, you will receive an upper invitation to a lower invasion. This requires the same techniques, ironically, that will one day save your marriage: Listen, follow her lead, make her laugh, flatter her silly, take control and then take the blame.

It's more than an honest night's work. It's a science. And women want you to know your craft, doctor. Haven't you been watching Sex and the City? Women I know say the show is a guilty pleasure. The "empowered" women on this show bounce through endless, unsatisfying, cavalier experiments with men -- but meanwhile they're fucking all of them! That's good news. Look at the underlying message: Women are horny. But there's more. These New York sexpots talk active but act passive, don't actually believe in anything and have not one shred of willpower. And still, they demand respect.

Every episode proves again that, in their neurotic groping for both a hot hump and validation, they're putting all the power in your hands. As long as they feel understood or at least free, they don't have a rule that can't be stretched or broken. Two things men are good at. Any gal worth the salt on her margarita glass will tell you she has dorked guys who were dorks. But the men who got into her pants knew something. Either by accident or design, they made a fast, sure journey straight to the center of her mind.

Mystery: >Ross Jeffries: > Cliff's Comments: Ross Jeffries Speed Seduction finally made it to Montreal this past weekend August 9, 10 & 11. Attendees flew in from as far away as Australia to attend and there were some powerful changes effected in the seminar on some of the participants. A couple of guys who were shy and never previously able to approach women lost their hesitations and were out doing what was next to impossible just days earlier. >Ross: Yes. This is one of the major "ups" I have on my alleged "competition". I can take guys who are so totally shy, they can't even talk with women (and some are so shy, they can't talk with ANY stranger, male or female), run them few a couple of simple processes, and then they are out meeting women with NO fear and total comfort, in a matter of MINUTES after doing the processes.

Mystery: My understanding of hypnosis is this: you can hypnotize a person into a particular state but that state will change in a few hours eventually. States change as environmental stimulus changes with time. 3 hours after being hypnotized, the victim's slowed internal switching speed returns to normal. It's like putting the cart before the horse. You can focus on confidence and tricking your brain for short amounts of time to get through the day ... OR ... you can focus on gaining COMPETENCE. Only with COMPETENCE does one obtain LONG LASTING confidence. Confidence and competence are IMO very closely bound by causation.

Cliff's Comment: I happen to think this topic (essentially the making of confidence) is of major importance to most of you reading these emails. Normally I would edit out all the covert snide remarks that permeate this debate between Mystery and Ross but I think here you will get a better flavor of what is being said if I leave them essentially as originally submitted. My personal view is that SS and MM are not necessarily in conflict. MM is mainly about opening up groups - Mystery clearly states that using SS once you are one on one with your target is an excellent way to go. I also see a significant difference between the confidence needed to do MM and the confidence needed to do SS - with MM, you really protect the ego because you are really just developing a method to start talking to people. With several approaches used in SS , you are more likely to be directly approaching your target and in one fashion or another putting your cards on the table. Mys doesn't feel that this is an o
verall effective strategy when dealing with "10's" not only because they are usually out in a group and rarely are out but they are not very approachable alone. But, in my way of looking at things, you need bigger balls to go up to an HB and tell her you think she's absolutely stunning or that she's a "shining example of genetic perfection" than to ask some guys or the UG about your friend's being asked to appear on the Ricki Lake show. Not to say the latter doesn't take confidence, but it's a lot different. And if there's one thing that SS does attempt to do, it is to train you what to say and to develop competence; I don't see that as being different between the two methods at all. Ross constantly tells his students that if they don't go out and practice what they've been learning, nothing is going to happen. So in that sense they both agree that you have to go out and do it. I think Mys remains skeptical about Ross's "new technology" primarily because he hasn't seen it himself. Even if what he says is c
orrect that it only has a temporary effect, think about being someone who couldn't act before and now you are in that state and doing what was previously impossible or extremely difficult for you. One thing I have definitely seen from meeting many guys over the years is that sometimes just having a little success propels them to greater success. I think if you "care only about RESULTS" you will be open to anything that works. >Ross: Now, you can "be a man" and FORCE yourself to do things while in a fearful state, or you can avail yourself of top technology. You can crawl across the desert on your hands and knees, half-dead and half-dying from thirst, or roar across on an air-conditioned, enclosed ATV, blasting your favorite music on the sound-system, sipping cool drinks. YOUR choice.

Mystery: Interesting metaphor, equating short term "mind fucking" of oneself with "comfortable travel" and at the same time limiting our readers by increasing the concept of mere ANTICIPATORY ANXIETY up past "fearful state" on through the shear agony of having to "crawl across the desert on your hands and knees, half-dead and half-dying from thirst". Talk about exaggerating to the point of absurdity (a logical fallacy described in THE BALONEY DETECTION KIT in the book The Demon Haunted World by Carl Sagan). My father, Mystery Sr. used to say, "Son, if it talks like shit, it's shit." Who am I to think that first comes COMPETENCE and THEN confidence over successive approaches? I can only tell you what works based on my knowledge of the field and by my relations with some really great PUAs . If we focused on INTERNAL STATE issues, we would have the momentum to actually get GOOD. SKILL comes from experience in the field. Lots of it. I tell you, nothing can give you confidence more than COMPETENCE. You can be made
to feel CONFIDENT for a short time by being run through "a couple of simple processes" in a "matter of MINUTES" ... OR ... you can ACCEPT that anticipatory anxiety is natural and healthy. It is ubiquitous throughout all of humanity in fact. Only insane people do not feel anticipatory anxiety when doing something they haven't done before. Accepting this truism, you may now get behind the steering wheel and learn how to steer despite your warranted fears. Honestly, who do you want flying your plane: a hypnotized pilot who FEELS confident but doesn't know his nose from his tail ... OR ... a COMPETENT pilot who may feel at first feel anxiety and therefore be a little more CAREFUL and double check his switches before settling into his seat for the long flight? However, this said, there are some that can't even get out the HOUSE, never mind approach a girl so RJ's "simple processes" would definitely be a step in the right direction. If you are PARALYZED by anxiety then beginning at the beginning is a step in the ri
ght direction. RJ gets you out of the house. I get you into the Clubs and PRACTICING. I get you approaching groups because women of beauty and quality are rarely alone (except in LA which is quite frankly an aberration ... and I've conducted workshops in MANY cities in America and even in Europe). I give you the tried and true methods for befriending various sized peer groups. Once you have built social proof and isolated the target , you can drive the nail home with SS at this phase. Then ... forgetting # closes (they SUCK SUCK SUCK), you either instant date or MAP close to see her for a Day 2 meeting. MM and SS are more powerful TOGETHER than apart. SS is both VERY BASIC and VERY ADVANCED. There are missing components. It denys the effectiveness of CLUB work merely because RJ has a PERSONAL THING against them. He can't work them MERELY due to his limiting beliefs about them. "It's too loud and smoky". Why has this NOT stopped some of the best PUAs on this planet from working them? Rick H plays in this
realm. I do. Craig does. MTL_PUA does. Supasta does. Mad Dash does. Stripped and Badboy and Style do, too. And Nightlight9 and No9, too. What does this say when some of the MAJOR PUAs work in this environment?

Cliff's Comment: Ross doesn't tell you not to go into clubs, only that his personal preference is to meet women elsewhere. I don't recall him saying that SS won't work in clubs, either (certainly I have seen Rick H and others use it effectively in clubs). I think we are all entitled to approach where we want and there's no reason to put someone down because they have different preferences than you.

Mystery continues: GROUP THEORY is extraordinary because ANYONE can learn it. Why pounce on the sickly lonely coffee shop girls when you can get the ALPHA-FEMALES ... in the same amount of time? No stopping them on the street. Wait for them to walk into a store because walking girls never walk far. They are always going SOMEWHERE. Go in and befriend the peer group. Be nervous, that's ok. Just know that you have the skill to GET THE GIRL ANYWAYS. The anxiety goes away AFTER the approach. In MM, I suggest you approach a dozen groups a night. The first 3 groups are WARMUPS to get your google into mode. Hell, be nervous, I don't care. I am. And I'm a performing artist. I get as nervous before my warmup approaches as I do going on stage or beginning a new workshop. So long as it doesn't STOP me, I accept it and MOVE ON. It goes away with SUCCESS, I PROMISE. Self-hypnosis is for AFCs . It's the MAGIC PILL that sounds too good to be true because ... it IS. Somewhere in all this debate RJ and I will find a compromise
, a cognitive model that works all the pieces into a single picture. SS fits into the ISOLATION PHASE of MM perfectly. But chuck the hypnosis. Altered states only allow your pockets to be picked when your eyes are closed.

Cliff's Comments: I think you'll find a world of people that will disagree with you about the effectiveness of hypnosis and I personally have experienced positive changes from it. Again, just because it may not work for you doesn't mean it won't work for others. >Mike: What is DESPERATELY needed is some in-field video's!

Mystery: Yes. I would contribute some of my sarges on video but only to show how MYSTERY works his room and not a public product or anything. Maybe I will do this and give it to those I know and trust. But then again, those I know and trust get to see me LIVE. That's what my workshop is ALL about. Speaking of, I am planning my first LIVE SEMINAR in NYC in September. Check my website later when I finalize plans and set dates. Not as good as the in-field workshop (nothing beats THAT!) but CHEAPER ... and I have more than a dozen workshops under my belt, many specifically for ADVANCED PUAs so my research over the last year will provide seminar attendees with some of the most FIELD-TESTED material on this fucking PLANET! I care only about RESULTS! I have many advanced student workshop outing reports to add to the website as well. The FAQ is at www.Mysterymethod.com . These updates will be made this week. >Still such a video of a MASTER PUA in action would give the very BEST instruction imaginable!

Mystery: Only ONE teaching method tops video: an IN-FIELD workshop. Next to that, VIDEO. Next to that, hardcore trial and error (the way I learned). Next to that, a seminar. Next to that a book or home study course. Next to that? As Ray Gordon says, "OPRAH". haaaaaa. >It would also be completely unique too and be more valued than anything else! Whoever comes out with THAT will have struck a veritable gold mine!

Mystery: And if any girl sees it, that guy will be labeled a PLAYER for LIFE. Not my thing. This PUA role is fine and dandy in front of your guys, but in real life, I'm not a PUA . I am a performing artist who happens to enjoy the company and affection of women of beauty. I even TELL women I conduct a workshop. I took Ross's lead when he told me how he words it. >Firstly, someone should do 10-15 of them and see if they can get the releases signed after. Until you try, you don't really know.

Mystery: That's why I would do it PERSONALLY. I don't need releases for showing friends my HOME VIDEOS. Only to MARKET and profit from them. >The other idea (mentioned by Dave Riker when he was here) is that it wouldn't be too difficult to alter or block the faces (and disguise the voices) of the women using today's computer technology so you wouldn't really need releases. I think these are going to done soon by someone, and it will be very interesting to watch.

Mystery; Let's talk tech. I brought a low light camera hidden in a pager into a club but the recording device was ... not practical to say the least. And the audio SUCKED. suggestions? >NightLight9: This is an area that doesn't get discussed much but should. Some basic rules of winging: 1) Who ever opens a set gets to pick his target . It's best to point out who it is so the wing can know before the approach, but otherwise assume it's the hottest chick (yes, that's a judgment call).

10) Don't try to outshine the lead. Unless you are leagues ahead of the lead and you are teaching them, it's their show until you start to separate. Once you have split into groups, do your thing. If you wanted to lead, you should have opened yourself. The only way to truly get good at winging is to wing a lot, and everyone is different, so you may need practice with that specific PUA . And, of course, there are exceptions to the rules. The most obvious being a strategy that you have worked out ahead of time. That said, the above is a very good general set of rules.

Mystery: Do you notice how NL9 focuses on TACTICS? Not internal states. It's all TACTICAL. MANEUVERS and STRATEGY. This is metaphorically more like a strategic game of speed chess than "crawling on your hands and knees through a desert." Group theory focuses on getting the HOTTEST GIRL, not DEALING WITH YOURSELF. Look OUTWARD, not INWARD. When buried in a groupset, you are too busy to worry about your FEELINGS.

Mark B.: I recently read a book called Callings by Gregg Levoy. It's a book about figuring out your true purpose in life and then following it. It relates to PUA as it talks about overcoming fear, anxiety, uncertainty and how to put that in the right context for yourself which can be easily related to our quest for more and more pussy. >Ovulu: > Mark B: I have created a simple two stage seduction process for myself. The first is the approach where I see the woman, walk up to her and then ask her to come and have dinner with me or a drink or go for a walk or a coffee, whatever. Then when I am with her I do not talk about sex, fucking, blowjobs, kissing or any of such sorts but just let her talk about whatever she wants keeping in mind to not let her get away with anything unruly. The second part of the seduction involves a lot touching - stroking her hand, rubbing her forearm, rubbing her shoulders and her lower back. Then when I feel like it I just kiss her neck and then her cheek and then
her lips. If she lets me and we continue then I do not stop and then take her to the bedroom where I fuck her. I found that the more I talk about sex or try to qualify her extent of her sexuality then the lesser the odds of actually fucking her.

Ovulu: MarkB, it appears your have a three prong attack rather than a two stage process: > Stage #1: The first is the approach where I see the woman, walk up to her and then ask her to come and have dinner with me or a drink or go for a walk or a coffee, whatever.

Ovulu: May I ask what are the conditions and terms for this type of walk up?

MB: You know it's funny that you should ask me this as I recently figured out what type of women I do well with. I do not do well with women regardless of their looks that seem very all over the place, so to speak, the high energy types that tend to move their arms and legs in all different directions and ones that tend to walk quickly and talk quickly as well as not having focus in a conversation. These women I find draining and I quickly run out of things to talk about. I do much much better with those that seem more focused on something or ones that are able to stand still more and ones that are able to hold attention for a longer period of time and have something to say other than grunts. In clubs I do better with women who just stand there either alone or with friends and look around rather than ones who are engaged in a group activity or a conversation - the social butterfly type. At malls or streets, I do much better with women who walk slower, take their time looking around, or are better able to hold
attention. So the first rule is she must be attractive and secondly she must appear calm, centered and somewhat in control of herself. I am very quiet and not a big talker by nature and find it difficult to make fragmented small talk. Therefore I do much better with women who are able to hold and carry on a conversation and not be easily distracted by something else. As well I enjoy deep meaningful discussions on a variety of topics and look for this type of woman as well for the sheer enjoyment of her company beyond her pussy. > Stage #2: Then when I am with her I do not talk about sex, fucking, blowjobs, kissing or any of such sorts but just let her talk about whatever she wants keeping in mind to not let her get away with anything unruly.

Ovulu: Specifically, what does this mean..."but just let her talk about whatever she wants keeping in mind to not let ! her get away with anything unruly". How are you controlling her banter for her to elicit conversation she wants?

MB: I do not allow them to get insulting or abusive to me. If a woman calls me a bastard as a joke, I will tell her in a serious tone that I do not appreciate being called that, ever, even as a joke. If she talks about her ex bf excessively, I tell her I do not want to hear about it or talk about it any more. I try to build chemistry by talking about things in which we both have a mutual interest. I try to respond positively to things that she tells me and build on that by continuing the conversation with her on that topic. But overall I find that I do well when I keep the structure going by putting her back on track if she digressed but I let her fill in the content. Some of my most successful times with women occurred when I really said almost nothing but simply allowed them to talk. All of a sudden almost as if just listening to them they became turned on and came onto me on their own. Funny creatures they are....I remember I met a dancer back in early June at a strip club. We talked for about 1.5 hours a
nd then I gave her my number. She called me a month later and invited me over to her Penthouse condo. I showed up at 9:00. We went over to her balcony where we drank, ate fruit and talked with me saying next to nothing to her other than acknowledging what she herself said. Suddenly she sat on my lap and began kissing me. We kissed for a few minutes and then proceeded to go to the bedroom.

Ovulu: Stage #3: I understand the final process of rocking her bowels in the bedroom on the terms you suggest. However, do explain the nuts and bolts of stages 1 & 2.MB: anything else?

MB: I see her, say "hello, I could not help but notice you" silence and let her talk. Ask her to coffee, lunch, dinner, etc. I try to sometimes also talk about something relevant to the setting where we both are before I tell her I noticed her if it applies. If it does not and the setting does not appear to be relevant for a setting discussion, I just go for what I want with her. Then we talk and talk and talk. I touch her hand casually, stroke her arm, rub her lower back subtly. If she responds positively, I kiss her and then proceed to the bedroom either that day or the next time I see her.

DrJay: Re: the part about videotaping approaches...have you heard of kenxtions? ( www.kenxtions.com ) ...he has a video that comes with his package that shows approaches. just an fyi...he used to have some clips on his website that you might find of interest. he basically rigged a camera into a backpack.

Cliff's Comments: Yes, I have the Kenxtions video and those are not bad except I don't think there's anyone reading these emails who will consider those approaches as being very advanced. I also think that in most of those the targets were receptive and the PUA didn't do much that would differentiate him from any regular guy doing an approach. What we are talking about here are watching more advanced strategies and tactics in action.

Iashabo: I notice that when I am flirting with a girl and things are going well they often will mention something that I can tell is intended to turn me on. For example, I was talking with a girl at a bar and she started going off about how people always tell her that she is good at giving massages and how she loves to go to strip clubs. I could tell she was trying to be flirtatious as hell, but I just didn't know if it was wise to act all turned on by her statements. I say this because I didn't want to make her feel as if I was all ga-ga over her (I notice that when women think you are ga-ga over them they start messing around with you, I think it may be a power trip thing or something). Any way, I played it cool by acting as if she wasn't really turning me on at all. However, I must have done something wrong cause about 3 minutes later she just left. What do you think would be wise to do in a situation like this?

Everlast: I would like to know if there are any members/ PUAs in the Miami area that I can connect with. Please contact me directly at everlast@techie.com

Luceo: > GameMaster (continuing tales in the saga of a man "in the zone"): ...encounter any resistance. Anyway, good thing we had the presence of mind to lock the doors cause 30 minutes later the phone is ringing off the wall. You could hear this guy raging on the answering machine...sounded a little like me 4 years ago before I grew up. He must have called about 6-8 times before we hear somebody banging on the door, then the kitchen door, scream scream yell holler scream......I reached over and turned off the light cause I knew the windows were next and sure enough ...bang bang on the bedroom window....more hollering and screaming. Beth was freaking out so I figured this was a good time to go down on her to sort of take her mind off things....it worked. Anyway, fuckhead finally left, called 3-4 more times and left more nasty messages.

Luceo: It's obvious to me you feel you did Beth a favor by separating her from that loser, but I'm wondering how you have prepared to handle him if he comes after you physically? I mean a guy that is so controlling as to buy an engagement ring to keep you away from her could quite easily snap and come shoot you or her or her and all her coworkers, and maybe some innocent people at the hospital, too. Did you take any steps to preclude that? I'd like a strategy for such things, without having to worry about buying a gun or martial arts, etc. Or do you just plan to talk him out of it in the moment, if that ever were to happen, since he obviously knows how to find you? Anybody else have any ideas on handling a dangerous bf after a bf -destroyer?

GameMaster responds: Here's my thoughts on this subject and Cliff this requires a little setup because of generational differences and general mentality I guess. Anyway, I'm 49 years old and I don't go looking for trouble anymore, although there was a time. So I'm not limited by the physical reluctance of what I call the Nintendo Generation.... no offense. However, I have cultivated a very commanding presence based largely on Major Mark's concept of the romantic hero. At least that's where I got the idea, and I had the rebellious Southern aristocratic background that made it easy to assimilate. To answer your question, I've met this guy and he is terrified of me. I'm gonna use a line from the Goddess Lara Flynn Boyle, who I will have one of these days by God, and I'm one of those guys that when he walks in a room all the other guys automatically hate me. My attitude is basically nobody can compete and I've had best friends stab me in the back cause they could never find a solution to beating
me down mentally, physically, or with the girls. Competition among friends should be outlawed but unfortunately it exists. I read alot about the allure of the "alpha" male....well I look at myself as the Alpha-Omega male, the beginning and the fucking end. I don't want to go into a lot of background but I'm blessed to have many experiences that challenged my will, fortitude, athletic ability, mental acuity, and there was heavy dose of intrigue built in along the way. With a lot of the girls I get involved with, I write them short stories that are romantic and sexual in nature and I incorporate aspects of their personalities in these stories. The central character, however, is a guy named Jake who is my alter ego. Jake is a very bad boy, and he's not somebody to be fucked with. I have become Jake, and since I made this transition the world is raining women. An unbelievable 8 in the last 2-3 months, two that dropped back in mysteriously after long absences, and two that are best friends that were competing in a
rather humorous manner for time. I think I'll hang on to this persona for a while as it seems to be working. Beth's boyfriend took one look at me and you couldn't have driven a ballpoint pin up his ass with a sledgehammer. My attitude, my body language, my comfort level, and what I "project" just said....."Dude, I am going to fuck your girl and there's not a Goddamn thing you can do about it." I could hear him screaming at her when I walked out the door and I knew that battle was already over. Some guys might say I was supplicating with the lawn mowing and shit but I look at it as needed exercise while cultivating my tan and this girl is very cultured with MANNERS and she appreciated and was touched by my voluntary help. I guess it worked. Anyway, to the general question of this or any other guy going postal or threatening you physically.....ain't gonna happen, Bro. I hear a lot of these guys talking smack but talk is all it is. There ain't nobody I've come in contact with in the last three years of stealing
wives and girlfriends right out from under that is prepared to back it up. Society today just doesn't condone that kind of thing and in this situation, if this guy were to take a poke at me after I've given his girl the greatest night of sex in her life.....how much respect would she lose for him, and how much would my stock skyrocket? And furthermore....my absolute favorite thing is to snake somebody's girlfriend right in front of the guy and seduce her on the spot and get her business card or we mentally exchange places of business, departments, full names, etc. so I can follow up with an anticipated phone call. And the Number 1 reason these guys won't do anything about it (and I just love this) is CAUSE IT AIN'T COOL! And with my target audience of under 35 it's ALL about being cool. I learned this all quite by accident but when I learned the ropes I found that I could fuck anybody I wanted to with no recourse. I spent two years as an insider in the country's top strip club and fucked everything that move
d under the watchful eye of boyfriends/husbands and they couldn't do a Goddamn thing cause it just wasn't cool. This blows my mind cause if you even think about one of my girls I'm gonna fuckin' kill you. That may be the difference, I don't know? And here's an example of how this works....one night in the club I had this chick sitting in my lap that I had nailed a couple of times....I think she may have let that slip to the bf cause he came in the club that nite, saw us and went ballistic. Threatened to kill me, kick my ass, etc. blah blah blah. I laughed at him and said something pithy like "what-ever." Anyway, the net net of that was that his GF bluepassed out early, came straight to my house, and we had the most mad sex you can have with a stripper and she refused to leave for two days. That's how this shit works. Well, you can tell it's a full moon today but that's todays rant. Hold the applause : ) (Separate posts by GameMaster:) > Ross: Well, patterns are A LOT more than canned speeches. You're using
the old stuff. Gamemaster: That was over two years ago. I don't use the patterns anymore. Now I'm relying on my strikingly handsome looks, devastating charm, commanding presence, sparkling wit, and animalistic instinct and allure to get what I want : )

(Another post by GameMaster:) GameMaster: Well, here's one for the record books. Went to dinner with Susan last nite.....and the subject of marriage came up. Susan asked me "what do you really want?" Well, my answer blew her away but it's basically from the core value construct but I matched it to hers. I told her she was nothing but a silly little girl concerned only about the size of a person's checkbook and when she decided to grow up then we could sit down and have a serious conversation about the long term. She was already pretty upset about that "pretentious" comment and this one knocked her for a loop. I'm the immature one in this equation so this sort of turned the tables on her.

She said she'd marry me today if it weren't for the competition so we agreed to table the discussion for a few more years. Anyway, we're going out again tomorrow nite but she just called and .....hang on while I pat myself on the back.....she hooked me up with one of her friends Saturday nite!!!!!!! After I got over the shock of course I teased her about being my pimp, etc. and how at least if I'm dating her friends she can keep track of my whereabouts - which is what I think this is all about. Susan asked me to call 'Spencer' (love that name) and set it up so I did our phone thing on Miss Spencer and just absolutely laid her to waste. Susan called back in 10 minutes "What have you done to my girlfriend????" haw haw haw I can't remember what I said to Spencer. We've never met but I just called her up and talked to her like I've known her all my life....for about an hour. 36 and Susan says she's pretty hot. Actually, Susan's never really seen that side of me cause we've known each other too long but over dinne
r last nite I said something boldlike and she said "I can't believe you would say that in front of me, I'm offended!" My reply "Susan, I love you..... but I'm not in a serious relationship with you and quite frankly you don't qualify cause you're just too Goddamn pretentious....it's just to your bad luck that you're already in love with me, and you know you can't control me!" That's when she excused herself for the ladies room and came back 10 minutes later to find me chatting it up with the restaurant manager who BTW I had dated for a while a few years back. Susan was livid but it wasn't too much later that this marriage discussion started. Too funny. Anyway,Susan has decided that she herself is going to make an appearance at this party Saturday nite, I suspect to check out the dynamic between me and her girl. Women are goofy! What's next? The more I learn the less I seem to understand these things.

Gregory Rasputin: > Maximillian Hell: Not a question but a declaration: "I am waiting for my friend(s)," spoken in a haughty tone as if somehow her waiting status precludes the convo from going any further. I've twice received this line upon my initial approach. I guess some sort of neg is called for: "YOU have friends?" But there must be something better than that--typically the target appears hostile in that circumstance.

Gregory Rasputin: To get that declaration, you must've asked "so what're you doing here?" A question so plain you must never ask it in the first place.

Matthew A.: > Carlos: The main goal is LIVING SEXUAL ECSTASY. Prolonging the sex act to live one or two hours of sex that are responsive, mentally focused, emotionally committed, and very pleasurable.

Matthew A: Kudos on your motivation to become a better lover and enjoy the pleasures of a woman. Be careful how you word it! "Living SEXUAL ECSTASY" I have these images of your dick falling off. LOL

Ecstasy is a state in which there is no opposite (and one in which their is nowhere to grow) and from your description, albeit a positive thought, is not as "earthly" as you may think. To be totally honest, I don't think there is such a state as sexual ecstasy, unless you kick the bucket while a Playboy Centerfold is riding your schlong.

If I were you, I would focus on gaining MORE PLEASURE with what is already there. Hyper-Emperia, Hypnosis for Sex, and you mentioned becoming multi-orgasmic, and to that I recommend "The Multi-Orgasm Man" written by Mantak Chia. I don't know if you are interested in Tantric practices. If you are curious, start with some simple reading and judge for yourself.